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Old 05-03-2012, 11:24 AM
IrisAwakened's Avatar
IrisAwakened IrisAwakened is offline
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Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 69
Default First Poly Break-Up

My poly boyfriend of 6 mos broke it off with me last Sunday. I have been married to my husband for 6 years and haven't been broken up with since I was in high school. It was so strange to feel that hurt again. I felt naiive for thinking that his talk of forever was true. What can I say, I'm an optimist! But the thing that made this different from those teen heartbreaks is that I had the love and support of my husband and other boyfriend. I can't believe what a difference that makes in recovering from the loss of my first poly love.

I mean, look at it this way, rebounding is easy and accepted when it is with existing partners! I know that my other (or only) boyfriend is relishing the extra time, and you know what, so am I. I know that this break-up was probably for the best because neither he nor I could stand the distance, as I am so much more an in-town type of girl. I like to see my loves everyday if I can. I am happy that he fought for his happiness instead of sacrificing it for my own. When he did it he said that it was for my happiness too, but I couldn't see that. How could taking his wonderful love away make me happy? It did, as could now focus on what is physically present in my life. My wonderful family, the love my husband has for me and my budding relationship with my boyfriend. As much as it hurts to not see him in my future, I am grateful for his courage.

I wanted to write this as a record of what a poly break-up can feel like. I want to help people who are going through it, or who are afraid to put their hearts on the line. If anything, this made me realize that while there is the risk of getting hurt, I feel it is less risky than when one is completely single. It is definitely worth the hurt, finding love like he and I share(d), its amazing.
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