Originally Posted by AnnabelMore
That's actually pretty standard, whereas the level of control that you're saying C's gf takes over him seems really creepy and unhealthy
I totally agree with you about the unhealthiness, and Alec did actually point that out to C yesterday (that's what got them talking), and C himself admitted that the relationship and the power dynamic is uneven. The whole thing makes me feel really sad and uneasy.
Then again, there isn't really much we can do, he doesn't even live around here and if he wants to stay, well. I don't even know him that well, to be able to affect the things in any way... I hope that he will gather the will and strength to get himself out of that. I don't think C is big on reading, but I think it's a good idea for me to talk with Alec, and see if he's got any thoughts. He agrees with me that the situation is bad, but I don't think they have much talked about it with C before yesterday.
I didn't mean to underplay C's situation in my last post, I don't know if it comes off that way since I went on to write about my own relationships. It's just that after an abusive childhood, healthy relationships still years later don't feel like something I can take for granted (even as I actually have healthy boundaries nowadays).