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Old 02-12-2012, 02:52 PM
AnnabelMore's Avatar
AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Join Date: Dec 2010
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I think that we make a mistake any time we look at our own experiences and try to generalize out to humanity. One person could say "I can't get over my jealousy no matter what I try, so jealousy is innate and happy polys are just fooling themselves." Another person could say "I got over my jealousy with a little trying, so jealousy is just a construct and monos just aren't trying hard enough." [note that I'm not saying you're saying that exactly, OP, but some people do take it that far]

Both would be wrong, I think, because they're assuming that their experience can act as a stand in for that of the human race. Certainly we can learn lessons from our own lives that can help some others, maybe even many others, but rarely if ever ALL others. In this case, for example, I would say from my reading and observations that jealousy is real and natural maybe impossible to let go of for some, non-existent or easy to let go of for others, and most are in the middle of those two extremes... they feel it as a real thing that does exist but can let out go with some time and work.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.

Last edited by AnnabelMore; 02-12-2012 at 02:59 PM.
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communication, compassion, compersion, emotions, envy, feelings, jealous, jealousy, monogamy, poly, polyamory, possessiveness, relationship dynamics, relationship structures, relationships, respect, self esteem, unconscious

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