Text Message: "I'm Poly..." WTF?!?!?!

[SmoovMochaNut]

I see what you're saying...you're cool about it. You trust PK.

My partner now knows she definitely bi. I agreed to allow her to continue talking to a girl she was interested in. The girl had been wanting to hook-up with her to meet & possibly play alittle. I encouraged my partner to meet & see what happens - they did meet & played. My partner liked eating pussy & getting her pssy licked & tongued by a girl, but needed some dick afterwards. Long story short, she has met another girl that she'd want to be xloser to.

She still talks to guys, but is really looking for women.

And i'm cool with her text/chat sesssions as well. Kinda see as her going out to a club and meeting other people there. I really don't have to know what their conversations is about....unless she wants to tell me.

[nycindie]

Originally Posted by SmoovMochaNut

I agreed to allow her to continue talking to a girl she was interested in.

You "allowed" your partner to talk to someone? Mighty big of you. Wow. Just wow.

[SmoovMochaNut]

Originally Posted by nycindie

You "allowed" your partner to talk to someone? Mighty big of you. Wow. Just wow.

W/o all of the detail....we discussed her interest in seeing women. We're married (for over 10 yrs). She wanted me to be OK with her desire & pursuit of a fantasy she had been curious about for years. She wanted to know if I was OK with her possibly pursuing sexual relationships with other people. By me saying that I "allowed" her is really saying that, after lengthy discussion of initional limitations, we knew that we could have a more open marriage where sex with other people would be OK.

She wanted me to pursue other friendships as well and openly supports & encourages me to do so. The big this honesty & communication. If she met a m or f that interests her, she'll tell me & visa-versa with me if I met a f that I wanted to be closer to.

Didn't intend to sound possessive of her. Just that if I wasn't cool with swinging & she still had strong feelings of wanting to do it, there would've been the possibility of separation. In a marriage, if 1of the spouses aren't into poly or swing & the other was, it just wouldn't work.

[Magdlyn]

Originally Posted by SmoovMochaNut

...if I wasn't cool with swinging & she still had strong feelings of wanting to do it, there would've been the possibility of separation. In a marriage, if 1 of the spouses aren't into poly or swing & the other was, it just wouldn't work.

Well, lots of marriages work where one partner is mono and the other is poly.The mono one just has to be cool with their partner being poly, even tho it's not the mono's preference.

It is quite common for one partner to be introverted, less social, and the poly one to be more outgoing and social. In fact, the mono one might be glad the other gets out of the house and out of their hair! My current bf, The Ginger, has this arrangement with his wife. She doesn't seem too interested in anything he does with me, just asks when she can expect him home.

[SmoovMochaNut]

Originally Posted by Magdlyn

Well, lots of marriages work where one partner is mono and the other is poly.The mono one just has to be cool with their partner being poly, even tho it's not the mono's preference.

It is quite common for one partner to be introverted, less social, and the poly one to be more outgoing and social. In fact, the mono one might be glad the other gets out of the house and out of their hair! My current bf, The Ginger, has this arrangement with his wife. She doesn't seem too interested in anything he does with me, just asks when she can expect him home.

...and that's cool, I understand that..as long as both partners/spouses are aware & are fine with the arrangement - no issues there. But i'm sure there have been just as many couples where 1 partner wanted to remain mono & expected the other to do the same. That's where they must trust each other & communicate their preferences before somebody gets their feelings hurt.