should i know or not?

[Pretzels]

Even though I'm relatively new to a successful polyfi thingee, I will say this, people change and get used to situations.

Eight months into things, T is much more comfortable in our arrangement now, so I feel a bit more comfortable telling him things about the time I spend with E. What goes on between the two guys is a little different. E will usually fill me in on their interactions if I ask. I think T is realizing two things...I'm not going anywhere (I've fled many a relationship in the past) and I'm not "weirded out" by what he does with E.

[idealist]

My primary partner and I share with each other. Depending on our mood at the time of sharing, we may share more or less. We have a way of reading each other and knowing what kind of space the other one is in. His secondary partner likes to give him long blow jobs (which I don't particularly like to do) so I like him to share that with me. I'm like...that's aweseome baby.....and I'm glad for him!! I've recently met a new guy and my primary partner was there (with a few female friends) on the first night we met. That was good because the two guys like each other and actually know one another from childhood. Now- I have a date with the new guy on Thursday night, so when I share with my primary, he will have a frame of reference. He's comfortable with the guy. That's important to us. I'm friends with his secondary on Facebook- we've met once....I'm open to meeting her again or hanging out with the two of them, but don't feel like I have to pursue it or make it happen. Now- my new guy has a sexy and hot female "friend" and I will pursue getting to meet her!....but I think I got off topic here!!

[ms74]

Thank you everyone for your advice and stories. It is something I need to really think about, if I want to know about their sex or not. I need to think about my feelings if I really want to know and if I can really handle the truth.

The whole poly lifestyle is completely new to me and want to make it work because I love my girlfriend more than anything but with my insecurities it is difficult. Thanks again