Safe Sex - Standards, Practices, Information & Resources

[redpepper]

Originally Posted by Ceoli

When I read my list it does seem really stringent, but I think I basically put it out that way to make sure that my potential partners are approaching sex with some sensibility. Like I said, I've only had to use dams for protection once since most of the time, all that stuff gets cleared up before we even get in bed together. I guess it's important for me to have partners who aren't freaked out about seriously thinking about their safe sex practices, so it's not so much about only going near people who are "clean". But I also recognize that as a young single woman without a long history of monogamy, I need to pay attention to things a bit more.

Good for you Ceoli! You are caustious. As it should be. I know what you mean though. Most of the time there is a lot of discussion and testing before getting down and dirty. I would rather wait to know and let desire build than fuss around with tons of protection just to get to bed. There is so much to do other than anything to do with fluid. I don't seem to be attracted to people who have lots of partners anyways.

Susie Bright is awesome. She's been around a while in sex positive circles.

[LovingRadiance]

Originally Posted by Magdlyn

Maybe it's terrible to give oral w/o a condom on the penis, but from what I read, risks are low... i would watch out for herpes lesions of course.

No lesion required for transmission as I posted in the thread about hpv.

Herpes is transmittable when a-symptomatic. It's OFTEN spread mouth to genitals and genitals to mouth as well.

[LovingRadiance]

At this point I'm fluid bonded with both Maca and GreenGecko-both of whom have been monogomous to me for the last I don't know how many years... crap... 10?
Anyway-if they choose to be with others then details will change and we do talk about it already.

[Magdlyn]

Originally Posted by LovingRadiance

No lesion required for transmission as I posted in the thread about hpv.

Herpes is transmittable when a-symptomatic. It's OFTEN spread mouth to genitals and genitals to mouth as well.

Do you have the link? How often is "OFTEN"?

[LovingRadiance]

I can't give you great details-I have herpes-so I make it a point to talk to my doctor every time I go in for the newest info-but admittedly I don't ask for numbers-because they are arbitrary for me since I already have it. SO I just ask for info on keeping it under control as much as possible and what to do to protect others from getting it from me.

I can tell you there is a lot of info on www.herpes.com
You might check that out ( I don't know how to make it a link-just typed it on here).

Gotta run-be back later to check back in!

[goldcactus]

http://sfcityclinic.org/stdbasics/

Found this to be a good site. I've been reading up on STD/STI's. I liked this sites "Risk Chart".

I can not find it again but when I was doing some intensive reading on one site it said that:
herpes will come out and surface, not necessairly producing a sore but can be contagious, once a month.

I've never heard this before and have been searching sites to find it again.

Glad for this discussion.
goldcactus

[LovingRadiance]

Originally Posted by goldcactus

http://sfcityclinic.org/stdbasics/

Found this to be a good site. I've been reading up on STD/STI's. I liked this sites "Risk Chart".

I can not find it again but when I was doing some intensive reading on one site it said that:
herpes will come out and surface, not necessairly producing a sore but can be contagious, once a month.

I've never heard this before and have been searching sites to find it again.

Glad for this discussion.
goldcactus

THAT is a kickass site for information. I LOVED the risk chart! In fact I sent it to a friend. Thanks for sharing it!!!

[Sweetheart]

We have herpes too. I wish I'd had correct information on it 25 years ago!

We are very strict about our safe sex practices:

- Trust/Honesty/Communication
- Fluid Bonding
- Condoms
- Testing

Fluid bonding is the main safe sex method with R. Hooray for polyfidelity!

I use condoms whenever I am with someone new or someone who doesn't have another method of birth control. I'm just used to using condoms. It's an ingrained habit.

R doesn't like dental dams or condoms, and prefers fluid bonding, but she uses condoms with new people, at least until they can get tested.

[Lemondrop]

Just wanted to point out that HPV testing should be available and can be done with your pap smear. I haven't done this previously but will be doing it if any of my partners takes new partners; twelve years ago I went from a clear pap smear to stage 3 precancerous in a year and it's a big fear for me. Condoms can help prevent the transmission of HPV but are not 100% effective.

[LovingRadiance]

I went in for my first appt since we went poly today.
I opted for taking the completely upfront and honest approach.
The poor intake nurse was pretty young and innocent (we do live in Alaska's Bible Belt) and her head flew up when I said I had two partners and yes they knew about each other and yes we all live together. But then curiosity kicked in and she was intriqued and friendly.
The doctor was easy going about it and content with the information as well.
Tomorrow I go in for blood work, they are pretty sure I need more vitamin D then the 4000 iu's daily that I take and are considering the possibility of thyroid issues (mild) since my WHOLE family has issues.
Overall everything went smooth as pie.
It was nice being able to talk to the doctor openly and honestly about my relationship dynamic and get no flack.