Poly Map

[nycindie]

Yeah, I do not dig that chart. It's ugly and complicated, and includes things that don't make much sense being there. And his commentary is stupid and redundant ("Need I say more?" No, please do not. Ugh.). It bugs my eyes out; I can't even look at it for more than a few seconds before I am weary of it.

I like this one so much better:

The Varieties of Intimate Relationship Chart

[Scott]

Originally Posted by redpepper

If your are referring to another thread could you please give a link so that people know which thread you are talking about? Thanks.

I did, in the OP. It's here:
http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?p=121976

Originally Posted by redpepper

I have seen this chart on here somewhere before.

Cool.

Originally Posted by redpepper

Hanged if I can remember the tag for it though.

Ah well. I think this thread's tag is easy to remember :-)

[Scott]

Ok, I see there's certainly a lot of feedback concerning this Poly Map. Because of this, I decided to email the producer of the chart, telling him about this thread; maybe he'll make some changes to it based upon what's been said here.

[rory]

I't hard to say why I dislike it. I like the one Nycindie brought better. It's clearer, but I'm not sure that's my main reason.

There was a quote from SourGirl
I`d say it doesn`t because much like his other supposed tongue-n-cheek stuff,...the humour is boiled in his own truths.

I think this is the thing. It's a joke, but I feel it makes value-judgements an promotes stereotypes, which I am not sure are helpful...

I'm not sure if changes are needed, though, if the point of it is to be funny and not so much to offer clarity.

[Scott]

Originally Posted by rory

I't hard to say why I dislike it. I like the one Nycindie brought better. It's clearer, but I'm not sure that's my main reason.

Wow, just noticed that link Nycindie put up. Cool.

Originally Posted by rory

There was a quote from SourGirl
I`d say it doesn`t because much like his other supposed tongue-n-cheek stuff,...the humour is boiled in his own truths.

I think this is the thing. It's a joke, but I feel it makes value-judgements an promotes stereotypes, which I am not sure are helpful...

I'm not sure if changes are needed, though, if the point of it is to be funny and not so much to offer clarity.

I don't see why it can't be funny -and- offer clarity.

[Scott]

Originally Posted by nycindie

Yeah, I do not dig that chart. It's ugly and complicated, and includes things that don't make much sense being there. And teh commentary is stupid and redundant ("Need I say more?" No, please do not. Ugh.). It bugs my eyes out; I can't even look at it for more than a few seconds before I am weary of it.

I like this one so much better:

The Varieties of Intimate Relationship Chart

That certainly looks good.. but it's missing atleast one category; Commercial. This is where there's a direct financial incentive to engage in sexual acts. When in my former poly group, I brought this category up. In the Poly Map, it seems to only refer to escorts, but in point of fact, sex work goes beyond that, also covering porn, of both the hard and soft variety (which, in turn, can now include some conventional movies). This is, ofcourse, a rather controversial subject, and may be a large part of why I had certain trouble in my former group -.-, but I did notice that porn, atleast, has been discussed in this forum before.

[SourGirl]

Originally Posted by Tonberry

Other than that, I like the chart. I find it complete, I'm wondering what's the situation of all the people who feel it doesn't account for them?

In my opinion, The whole thing should at least have the default of being in a 'non-monogamy' balloon. When we were swinging, if I said to a swinger I was in an open-relationship,.. I would be told ' Ohh, you want feelings, or some kind of relationship involved ?'
I say to poly people, 'open relationship' and I hear ' Ohhh, you just want to fuck ?'
I think we can all agree that friends with benefits, or having feelings and sexual times with people we care for, but maybe don't engage in a forward-moving relationship with, is not some small niche ? It`s a rather large chunk of dating.

So, some of the definitions are a little broader, and could actually be funnier, if there was some more well-rounded humour.

Why does any of this matter on a supposedly 'funny' chart ?

Because people use his labelling and opinion like its some type of poly-bible to go by. Newbies and even people that know better, tend to stick to his word.

I tried to deny this for a long time, but dating and conversing online, has proven otherwise. If only I made some kind of cash off of every Franklin link someone has sent me, trying to 'correct' me.

When you suggest to those people that it`s just an opinion, they seem very confused. 'THIS IS HOW POLY IS DONE DAMMIT !'

So my little jaded-self just figures if he is going to have all this in-depth, 'This is how we do it' stuff, that people recommend, then some accountability in both the humour and practical would be nice.

[dingedheart]

Wow SG,

I think you beating around the bush so speak ...why not just answer Scott directly.

Scott will eventually learn the truth. Its just a matter of looking back at some your old postings.

The truth is she pissed that the box ( pun intended) that she fits in (again pun intended) is not represented. Let just say it starts with F and rhymes with misting.

Also, I know she's probably too embarrassed to tell you but she is a huge sucker for song lyrics which is why she didn't respond....actually it all kind of embarrassing ....but we love her so what ya going to do.

See SG don't you better now?...I know do

I might have to come out of retirement for this.

[SourGirl]

Dear (very deeply), dinged :

Originally Posted by dingedheart

The truth is she pissed that the box ( pun intended) that she fits in (again pun intended) is not represented. Let just say it starts with F and rhymes with misting.

I want my box back dammit. I want to practice my ____. Wait, is our rhyme scheme a,b,a,b,c,c, ( in which case, this will all come back on you.) or, are we busting out the Eminem ?

Originally Posted by dingedheart

Also, I know she's probably too embarrassed to tell you but she is a huge sucker for song lyrics which is why she didn't respond....actually it all kind of embarrassing ....but we love her so what ya going to do.

True. Though I`m rather fond of that '3-6-9 ...the goose drank wine,..' song. As for embarrassment, ..I`m only embarrassed for you, m'dear.

Originally Posted by dingedheart

See SG don't you better now?...I know do

I`ll feel even better when it`s my turn to share. Pssst,..you did say you wanted Scottie to beam you up, or something like that. Wink, wink, nudge, nudge.

Originally Posted by dingedheart

I might have to come out of retirement for this.

Sorry, thats reserved for Brett Favre. However, if you keep sending random people pics of your junk, we might reinstate you.

Much love - A Random Person.

[AutumnalTone]

Originally Posted by nycindie

Yeah, I do not dig that chart. It's ugly and complicated, and includes things that don't make much sense being there.

Ditto.

I like this one so much better:

The Varieties of Intimate Relationship Chart

I like this one so much better! Removing the extraneous kink material to leave just the relational material makes for a much cleaner mapping.