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Old 01-12-2012, 08:07 PM
km34 km34 is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2011
Posts: 624

I feel like there has been a complete shift in everything since I last posted about this. lol Not necessarily in a good way, but I'm not devastated, so.. Yeah.

Fiona still sucks at talking to me. Not sure why, but for some reason she doesn't feel like she can tell me when things bother her. She has been stressing about how Mario and I interact. I am a huge tease (my husband calls me an emotional sadist) and Mario loves it. Fiona doesn't get it. So, I will say things that if you didn't know me would sound terribly mean, but I am 100% joking and will always say what I really think very soon afterward to avoid confusion. Well, Fiona will read some of the texts I send Mario, but not all of them and will read some of the things he sends me, but not everything and feels like we're being mean to each other and aren't getting along. And apparently when I am trying to be completely honest and supportive, I come off as angry (case in point: I told them the other day that if they wanted some Saturday evenings to get to know other people or hang out with other friends, Keith and I have things we want to do that aren't kid-friendly so we could do that. Fiona thought I was upset that they would have other interests, while in reality I meant it. I wouldn't mind doing some of the stuff Keith and I have talked about.).

So anyway, with this whole perceived conflict between Mario and me (which he and I discussed and agree doesn't really exist), Fiona was struggling, much like I was, with trying to make everyone happy. I finally told her to just do what she wants and everyone else will deal. Later in the evening I told the group (the 4 of us were all hanging out at that point), that I was going to start practicing what I preached and unless someone specifically asked me not to do something, I was going to do what I want. lol It seems harsh even to me, but if they're not comfortable telling me what they want then I shouldn't have to always be second guessing myself. I won't purposefully hurt anyone and I will be honest about my plans and give everyone a chance to react, but I'm not going to change my plans unless there is an outright reason to.

To me, this feels like the beginning of the end. Already. Fiona still seems uncomfortable talking about our relationship as a relationship (it is always 'this situation we have going on' or something like that) and even after multiple requests on my side to talk to me, doesn't tell me when something is bothering her. She didn't tell me about thinking I was upset Saturday night and 4 days later!

Oh, and she told me last night that she is really fine with me going to the club without her. Whether it's true or not, I can't tell, because she acts really weird every time she brings it up. But yeah, the end of this month, Keith and I are going. Or at least that's the plan for now.
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