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Old 01-04-2012, 09:41 PM
ViableAlternative ViableAlternative is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2010
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vanille View Post
I hope I don't appear meek and passive... or just justifying situations that are wrong.
Please forgive the crude bluntness, but, yeah. You do. And I don't think you're at fault for it.

From the outside looking in, this looks an awful lot like emotional abuse.

Mind you, this is only based off of your words that I've read, and I am no professional. So don't take my word for it. Just, it looks like you give and give and give, and he's happy to lap it all up, but when it's his turn to give, he feels no obligation to reciprocate. He's not giving back. Sure, he's giving financially, but that doesn't absolve him of treating you as an equal. Sometimes it's hard to see that happening when you feel financially indebted to someone.

Here's what the inside of his head is looking like to me: If _he_ can date other chicks and he gets hot sex, he benefits. Whether or not you benefit is irrelevant. If _you_ can date other chicks and he gets even hotter sex, he benefits. Whether or not you benefit is irrelevant. If _you_ date other _guys_, he does not benefit, and has the detriment of sharing "his" chick with other guys. Whether or not you benefit is irrelevant.

There's so much inequality in all of this that it's a little painful to read.
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marriage vs. polyamory, married dating

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