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  #11  
Old 01-04-2012, 07:45 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
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I like watching sports TOO! And I'm the only person in my household who does. *sigh*

vanille, that sounds like quite a perplexing issue. I wish you luck trying to figure out what you want/need as far as relationships and companionship goes. I have a very good friend who I think might be asexual, but he and I have never really discussed it. In the long long ago, it may have played a role in why he and I didn't work, but there were lots of other factors too. I'm not exactly addicted to sex, but I have a STRONG sex drive and have never understood some of the attitudes about sex being something to be hidden or ashamed of (though privacy is of course fine) or that women are just supposed to "put up" with sex to keep their partners happy. Eff. That.
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  #12  
Old 01-04-2012, 07:45 PM
km34 km34 is offline
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Originally Posted by vanille View Post
I always wondered how Christians deal with polyamory.
I identify as Christian in the tradition of Christian meaning 'Christ like.' Jesus taught love, compassion, kindness, and general being a good person. I'm all about that. He taught self-sacrifice for the good of the whole. I try to be like that - I fail more often than not, but I still consider myself a work in progress.

As for Fiona looking into Buddhism... Her doctor suggested meditating as a way to lower her blood pressure. Meditating made her think of Buddhism, she decided to look into it. I really don't think she is going to like it as a religion (I think she is rather anti-established religion even if she doesn't realize it) but I think it would be great if she found something she could believe in so that she could find more people she could relate to.
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  #13  
Old 01-04-2012, 07:51 PM
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vanille vanille is offline
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Originally Posted by ThatGirlInGray View Post
<snip> or that women are just supposed to "put up" with sex to keep their partners happy. Eff. That.
I hope I didn't come across that way. I don't just "lie there like a fish" praying it will be over with. I take satisfaction in knowing that I am doing something that my husband enjoys. I know it's important to him and I take joy in trying to perfect that art. I'm happy when he is happy.

Quote:
Originally Posted by km34 View Post
I identify as Christian in the tradition of Christian meaning 'Christ like.' Jesus taught love, compassion, kindness, and general being a good person. I'm all about that. He taught self-sacrifice for the good of the whole. I try to be like that - I fail more often than not, but I still consider myself a work in progress.
<snip>
I really don't think she is going to like it as a religion
Ah, I get your point in regards to Christianity.

I think the link between Atheism and Buddhism is that it's not necessary to call it an organized religion. She can take what she wants (learning compassion, karma, acceptance of suffering .. etc) and leave whatever she does not need. There are many branches of Buddhism and I'm sure there is something for most people.

I feel like it's made me more accepting of life and not as afraid of death.

Don't discount it yet
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  #14  
Old 01-04-2012, 07:57 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
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Husband and I both identify as Agnostic, ThatGuyInBlack (partner) identifies as...I honestly don't know. There's a belief in a higher power, but I think he falls somewhere between Christianity and paganism. I have a friend who is straight, possibly poly, and Buddhist but I've never really talked to him about it.

As far as how Christianity deals with polyamory, I've been thinking about this in regards to how I come out to my Catholic mom (in a few years). In the Old Testament there were plenty of mistresses, so I figure (if there is a) God can't be COMPLETELY opposed to multiple partners. Ultimately, I don't see God be against love in any form that respects and satisfies all parties involved, whether it's poly, gay marriage, etc. Luckily my mom agrees about gay marriage- she doesn't think religion should have ANYTHING to do with the legal status of a committed relationship, so I already know she's more willing to be reasonable and open-minded than some Catholics. However, she still flipped out when it was HER daughter who came out as Bi. :-/ So, we shall see.

And thanks for the responses, you guys! Y'all are FAST!
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  #15  
Old 01-04-2012, 08:01 PM
ThatGirlInGray ThatGirlInGray is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by vanille View Post
I hope I didn't come across that way. I don't just "lie there like a fish" praying it will be over with. I take satisfaction in knowing that I am doing something that my husband enjoys. I know it's important to him and I take joy in trying to perfect that art. I'm happy when he is happy.
No no, not at all! That comment of mine was totally separate and comes from being part of a family where my grandmother gave birth ELEVEN TIMES because she was "doing her duty" as a wife.
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  #16  
Old 01-04-2012, 08:40 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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To be fair, it's easy to take a pot spot at sports, but I do watch football.
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The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.
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  #17  
Old 01-04-2012, 08:45 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Speaking of poly and the bible, Abraham and Sarah totally had a unicorn -- Hagar. She was younger and subservient (literally a slave) and they had her bear a child for Abraham. But then Sarah flipped out because she felt like Hagar was getting uppity (so common amongst unicorn hunters...) and kicked Hagar out. God told Hagar to be a good girl and respect the primary couple, and she was allowed to come back until Sarah flipped out AGAIN and kicked Hagar and her son Ishmael out for good when her own kid, Isaac, was born.

Aside from adding the poly terminology, I'm not making a word of this up. Unhealthy poly relationships are an ancient phenomenon...
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The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.
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  #18  
Old 01-04-2012, 08:49 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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A painting of the happy vee: http://deepintoscripture.com/wp-cont...ead_d2h_83.jpg
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The major players. Me, 30ish bi female. Gia, girlfriend of 4+ years. Clay, boyfriend/dom. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eddie, roommate & fwb.
The supporting cast. Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler. Dexter, Gia's lover. Helen, Eric's lover. Izzy and Nikki, Clay's partners. Liam, Eddie's husband.
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  #19  
Old 01-04-2012, 09:23 PM
ThatGuyInBlack ThatGuyInBlack is offline
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I don't think being bisexual had anything to do with me being poly, personally, as I was heavily closeted from even myself for about 9/10 of my life. Call it a product of my upbringing and environmental factors. I love Texas, but a lot of the people here can take a long walk off a short pier.

I will say that being poly kind of opened the door for me to embrace my bisexuality. I'm really not sure why. It's sort of like "Well, I opened this door... I might as well open the next one and see what's back there! Could be a new car!"

So far I haven't found a car.
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  #20  
Old 01-04-2012, 09:56 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by AnnabelMore View Post
Speaking of poly and the bible, Abraham and Sarah totally had a unicorn -- Hagar. She was younger and subservient (literally a slave) and they had her bear a child for Abraham. But then Sarah flipped out because she felt like Hagar was getting uppity (so common amongst unicorn hunters...) and kicked Hagar out. God told Hagar to be a good girl and respect the primary couple, and she was allowed to come back until Sarah flipped out AGAIN and kicked Hagar and her son Ishmael out for good when her own kid, Isaac, was born.

Aside from adding the poly terminology, I'm not making a word of this up. Unhealthy poly relationships are an ancient phenomenon...
Abraham also had quite a few concubines who bore him children, which are barely mentioned. Keeping in mind that throughout the bible, women are property, the bible doesn't strictly forbid multiple spouses or even hordes of concubines.
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