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  #1121  
Old 11-04-2011, 06:51 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Great to hear InLovewith2

I'm celebrating getting my living space back after a size-able flood
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  #1122  
Old 11-23-2011, 07:35 PM
lovinhimloviner lovinhimloviner is offline
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Default Fresh Start

Our family has found a house big enough for all of us to live and not be on top of each other. I am very excited about this. There is enough rooms for hubby and M to have a room, me and hubby to have a room, J and I to have a room and all 4 kids get their own rooms too!!

I am not so delusional to think life will be a dream come true from here on out but I think it will help out a lot to have space.

Things have been going pretty good around our house. Hubby is working and J is taking care of the house and kids. Hopefully j will find a job too and we will all have jobs. Hubby and I have actually got a lot closer the last month or so. I have learned to let go of him a little and that has made things a lot nicer at home. I'm sure my need to talk to him and be with him as much as possible is a little irritating but I have tried really hard to let go as much as I can for now.

I am trying to let go because I feel like the problems we do have are based around the fact that I hold on too tight. I want hubby and M to be as happy as possible and I am tired of being a burden on them or an obligation. I am not asking for "my night" anymore. If they let me have one I will take it. I just want to focus on me and J and hope it makes everyone's lives easier.

I LOVE my family!! Each and everyone one of them. I can not wait to get into our new house and get into a routine that works for all of us. I can't imaging life without M or J. I have never loved another female (non sexually of course) as much as I love M. She is an amazing person and makes hubby so unbelievably happy.
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  #1123  
Old 12-03-2011, 03:32 PM
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And so the Xmas season begins! Today we will be going over to decorate a tree with Redpepper's hubby's mom and step dad. This will be the second year in a row and is a reminder of just how supportive they have been with our family
Between XMAS and New Years we will had over to RP's parents' vacation cottage to spend time with her entire family including her brother and his partner. There are always interesting discussions and a true sense of bonding when we do these things I believe.

I don't write much stuff on here anymore and I think I know why. Every little step was a huge triumph to get to this point. Now we are just simply living it and the fact that out family dynamic is a little different has become transparent. We're just family
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  #1124  
Old 12-03-2011, 05:11 PM
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Hey. Mono. The ex-wife is coming too.
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  #1125  
Old 12-03-2011, 05:20 PM
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Hey. Mono. The ex-wife is coming too.
Weehooo!!!
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  #1126  
Old 12-11-2011, 07:56 PM
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Default Continuing to learn :)

Last night myself, PN, LB and Redpepper's parents went to watch her sing in her choir at a local theatre. It was a great show and the entire family was very proud of our loved Redpepper

Afterwards, PN went dancing with friends and Redpepper headed off to a "poly" party with Derbylicious and her hubby. I call it a "poly" party because it included people from the local community. I stayed home and had a quite night to myself watching over my little buddy.

Having a partner who is independant can certainly relieve the pressure of having to do things as a couple. The idea that she was with Derby also helps take away a sense of obligation to attend as well. I think it is important to remind myself that we are often in two different streams of social comfort. I enjoy hanging out with both but I think it is still better to step back from the poly social scene and give RP that space to have fun without me around or worrying that I am going to smack someone upside the head for flirting with her And why the hell wouldn't they...she's a sexy lady!!

It's interesting to know that after almost thre years I still don't feel a true part of either social circles. Luckily I am very comfortable in the space between as I enjoy solitude and keeping most people at a distance.

Learning is success, and so is acceptance! Lots of things going on internally, rethinking boundaries, rethinking what parts of traditional "commitment" I am holding onto and wondering what the future holds. What's next?? Make no doubt there will be plenty of love for RP and family
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  #1127  
Old 12-12-2011, 05:25 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
It's interesting to know that after almost thre years I still don't feel a true part of either social circles. Luckily I am very comfortable in the space between as I enjoy solitude and keeping most people at a distance.
I tried for years to fit in with my husbands social circles and always felt like a bit of an outsider. One day I had a revelation, I personally would not choose any of these people as my friends, so why am I making my self miserable trying to push myself into a close friendships with them? I instead went out to find people I share interests with and was amazed at how much happier I became. So now he has his circle of friends and I have mine. Even going to parties and other events with his group of friends is much more relaxed, because I can enjoy these people as his friends instead of trying to make myself fit in.
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  #1128  
Old 12-12-2011, 07:27 PM
OpenandCountry OpenandCountry is offline
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Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
I tried for years to fit in with my husbands social circles and always felt like a bit of an outsider. One day I had a revelation, I personally would not choose any of these people as my friends, so why am I making my self miserable trying to push myself into a close friendships with them? I instead went out to find people I share interests with and was amazed at how much happier I became. So now he has his circle of friends and I have mine. Even going to parties and other events with his group of friends is much more relaxed, because I can enjoy these people as his friends instead of trying to make myself fit in.
This is interesting. As of now I have my family, my friends from work/school, Husband's friends, and boyfriend's friends. I love all of them, but they are all seperate. Social circles are complicated at times.
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  #1129  
Old 12-18-2011, 07:17 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Default Burlesque loving :)

Wow, what a night of great shows, friends, family, metamours and sexy confident women!

Last night Redpepper had a Xmas burlesque show and she rocked as per normal

Her husband, PN, was there along with Derby and her husband, myself, and several good friends to show our support and just have a good time together.

One of the other performers asked RP who we all were and I'm sure was a little surprised to find out that three of us were her partners and her girlfriends husband was also there LOL!

We are a very comfortable group to witness by anyone's perspective and I can honestly say, with confidence, that we all care for and respect each other. You can feel the extended consideration among us...and that is the key to our success
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  #1130  
Old 12-19-2011, 05:02 AM
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Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
One of the other performers asked RP who we all were and I'm sure was a little surprised to find out that three of us were her partners and her girlfriends husband was also there LOL!

We are a very comfortable group to witness by anyone's perspective and I can honestly say, with confidence, that we all care for and respect each other. You can feel the extended consideration among us...and that is the key to our success
I love this. Thank you for sharing.
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