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  #11  
Old 12-04-2011, 08:05 PM
morrisslig morrisslig is offline
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Well he stood me up, so I guess that's how it goes. Dust myself off and move on I suppose. Feeling hurt right now though.
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  #12  
Old 12-04-2011, 08:09 PM
bassman bassman is offline
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oh, no thats awful. Why do people do that -make an agreement and then not show up - you could have spent your time doing something else.
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  #13  
Old 12-04-2011, 08:28 PM
morrisslig morrisslig is offline
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I know, it doesn't help that my wife is now showing signs that she is happy that he didn't follow through. So I am sitting here utterly confused and feeling foolish. Now I have to wonder if he was 'playing' me/us and this will be the hot topic at his work place.
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  #14  
Old 12-05-2011, 03:39 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by morrisslig
Well he stood me up ... Now I have to wonder if he was 'playing' me/us and this will be the hot topic at his work place.
Why would this be fodder for gossip if he was simply invited to hang out with the two of you over the weekend? I had the idea from what you posted that it was left as a pretty casual invitation, not a promise of sex or something like that, because you were trying to be careful with the work connection, and I thought all the wondering and nervousness about flirting and sex was in your own head.

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Originally Posted by morrisslig View Post
She went down and directly asked him if he wanted to go out with us this weekend. He said yes and took our number.
Was there more to the invitation than that? If she made it sound like a kind of proposition, that would make things weird (and possibly why he chickened out). But if it was just, "hey you wanna hang out'" don't worry too much.
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  #15  
Old 12-05-2011, 03:48 AM
morrisslig morrisslig is offline
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Nycindie - This was a casual invitation but I was slightly paranoid earlier with all the negative thoughts going through my mind.

No more to the invitation than what I had typed. And yes I understand that the proposition could have freaked him out, I know it would me no matter how hot I was for someone.
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  #16  
Old 12-05-2011, 06:28 AM
Storm Storm is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by morrisslig View Post
I know, it doesn't help that my wife is now showing signs that she is happy that he didn't follow through. So I am sitting here utterly confused and feeling foolish. Now I have to wonder if he was 'playing' me/us and this will be the hot topic at his work place.
Sorry to hear he stood you up, that sucks. If you're feeling negative about your wife's reaction, talk to her about it. Make sure she really is ok with entering into a poly relationship and make sure she is really ok with you seeing a guy.
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  #17  
Old 12-05-2011, 06:50 AM
bassman bassman is offline
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At first I thought you guys had made a definite "be there at such and such a time and place", but I'm reading now that it was more casual than that.

I guess that for him, it was just a casual "maybe we'll meet up, maybe we wont" kind of thing in his mind.

Whereas for you guys, its a huge thing, because youre hoping it leads to date, and poly, and sex, etc. You guys were dealing with hyper emotions around this potential event, whereas for him it might just be casual thing, because he doesnt really know what you guys are up to yet.
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  #18  
Old 12-05-2011, 02:42 PM
morrisslig morrisslig is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by bassman View Post
At first I thought you guys had made a definite "be there at such and such a time and place", but I'm reading now that it was more casual than that.

I guess that for him, it was just a casual "maybe we'll meet up, maybe we wont" kind of thing in his mind.

Whereas for you guys, its a huge thing, because youre hoping it leads to date, and poly, and sex, etc. You guys were dealing with hyper emotions around this potential event, whereas for him it might just be casual thing, because he doesnt really know what you guys are up to yet.
I think your post sums it up the best Bassman. Thank you for writing this as it has helped to see it from someone else's perspective. I agree with the hyper emotion statement the most. He probably didn't/doesn't have a bloody clue what is going on!

However just to clarify, my wife did ask him to call at a predetermined time and he failed to do so. Regardless of whether he knew what was going on or not, he was invited to do something with me and he failed to let us know he was not going to make it.

I hope this has cleared up some of the confusion of my posts. I value greatly the responses I have gotten.
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