Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Poly Relationships Corner


Thread Tools Display Modes
Prev Previous Post   Next Post Next
Old 12-01-2011, 04:08 PM
morrisslig morrisslig is offline
Join Date: Nov 2011
Location: Toronto
Posts: 10
Default First 'date' & mixed feelings

I don't know where to begin, but from the top seems best I suppose.

I am married to a wonderful woman who recently has agreed to open up our marriage of 5 years. There has been a guy (B) on the horizon for the last year or so that has been of interest to me but the timing was never right. I noticed him staring at me every time we would go by and get something (he is in the service industry). Unfortunately we knew his boss and family quite well and this last year we got to know them better through a contract we did for them. Well B was relentless in getting my attention but without saying anything due to people always being around. So I think I have spoken to him about three times since knowing him, but by God I have never felt like this for any man before.

I would find myself daydreaming and even dreaming about him, something of which was foreign to me as I never recognize anyone in my dreams. My wife knew there was an attraction there and could see it was being reciprocated.

My wife knew I had been in a open relationship prior to being with her and that it was the safest I have ever felt in that dynamic. So we had many talks, many arguments and some tears along the way figuring out what this meant to us and our standing as a couple.

Well cut to now, well yesterday actually. She went down and directly asked him if he wanted to go out with us this weekend. He said yes and took our number. My wife will leave the two of us to get to know each other if he can make it and we will take it from there. This is where I start to feel weird I suppose. I never in a million years thought he would say yes. I don't even know if he knows we are married or thinks we are just friends (everyone calls us 'the girls').

I should be feeling excited, but I am just riddled with nerves. My wife wants to have sex with me more than ever and I know why and understand that but I have so much on my mind right now that the thought of being intimate with anyone is impossible. I feel selfish and I have a sinking feeling that my 'greed' will bite me in the bum somehow. I don't feel like I deserve anyone let alone two people. But I know I want a family and children in the future, something of which she is dragging her heels on, which is fine as she is younger than me.

I don't know what I am looking for in advice other than some fresh insight into what seems a messy situation yet in written word it seems quite straight forward.

Thanks for reading, I am not the best at formatting and tend to jump from one thought to another!
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 09:03 PM.