Am I really polyamorous?
I have never posted on a message board, but I thought I might find someone who feels like I do. Perhaps I'd find answers to nagging questions. In 1990, I came out as an openly gay man. At that time, I would never have dated more than one person at the same time. My first monogamous relationship lasted for a few months in 1998. I seemed happy with monogamy, but not in the relationship because my boyfriend was abusive.
Apparently, I started seeking anonymous sexual encounters because I couldn't handle the stress of a relationship. Fulfillment was fleeting at best. I have only been monogamous for one or two short periods since 1998. I feel trapped by monogamy and am too jealous for an open relationship.