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  #11  
Old 11-12-2011, 11:33 PM
FireChild FireChild is offline
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Originally Posted by AnnabelMore View Post
But what about the serious dating stage and my scenario above with the birthday party or other similar situations that could come up (let's say you just got a promotion at work and are inviting your closest peeps out for drinks to celebrate)? I'm really curious how you're supposed to just live your life if you don't want your loves to meet, or they themselves don't want to meet? Seems like such a hassle... Maybe I'm more social than some people?
Maybe. I dunno. I'd invite everybody but they wouldn't have to sit and talk and be all involved with each other. More like "Hey this is A and we've been seeing each other for a while" and then "B this is A same thing goes" and then just keeping it moving. *shrug*

Now that I'm married, our bond is deeper so anyone coming into the situation would have to be able to at least tolerate my husband.
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  #12  
Old 11-14-2011, 12:31 AM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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If I were dating several people and all or some of them didn't want to meet each other, worrying about who to invite to my birthday party would be so unimportant to me. If I were going to throw a party for myself (not really something I'd do, but just pretending), I'd invite whichever lover I thought would enjoy getting along with the other guests and then I'd make arrangements to get together individually with my other lovers. Dinner here with one, brunch there with another, see a play with someone else. Why would it need to be difficult just because someone doesn't want to meet someone else?

If all my lovers knew I had other lovers and were okay with me mentioning the others from time to time, were cool with my saying who I have plans with, and were honest with me about whether they were dating anyone else, etc., but they didn't want to meet any of the others nor know anything else about them (other than my safer sex practices), what's wrong with that? I don't consider this a strict DADT; to me, if a lover wanted to pretend I was all his and never hear a word about anyone else, that would be DADT and probably not provide me with much fun nor any sense of relief and relaxation from being honest and open about what I'm doing. But just because I'd be fucking a few people doesn't mean I'd have to force each of them on the other. "Here, you must know who else is sticking his dick in me for the sake of being honest and poly!" Blech.
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  #13  
Old 11-14-2011, 01:41 AM
FireChild FireChild is offline
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Originally Posted by nycindie View Post
If I were dating several people and all or some of them didn't want to meet each other, worrying about who to invite to my birthday party would be so unimportant to me. If I were going to throw a party for myself (not really something I'd do, but just pretending), I'd invite whichever lover I thought would enjoy getting along with the other guests and then I'd make arrangements to get together individually with my other lovers. Dinner here with one, brunch there with another, see a play with someone else. Why would it need to be difficult just because someone doesn't want to meet someone else?

If all my lovers knew I had other lovers and were okay with me mentioning the others from time to time, were cool with my saying who I have plans with, and were honest with me about whether they were dating anyone else, etc., but they didn't want to meet any of the others nor know anything else about them (other than my safer sex practices), what's wrong with that? I don't consider this a strict DADT; to me, if a lover wanted to pretend I was all his and never hear a word about anyone else, that would be DADT and probably not provide me with much fun nor any sense of relief and relaxation from being honest and open about what I'm doing. But just because I'd be fucking a few people doesn't mean I'd have to force each of them on the other. "Here, you must know who else is sticking his dick in me for the sake of being honest and poly!" Blech.
SO much better with the words than I was. This. All of this.
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