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  #41  
Old 05-27-2010, 02:41 AM
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rolypoly rolypoly is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Ceoli View Post
Unfortunately in this day and age, if you want to protect yourself against warts, that usually means "HPV barriers".
HPV is apparently extremely common. I'm hearing from so many women that they have had cervical cancer from it. Even one of my aunts who has been in a monogamous marriage for 30+ years. Seems hard to avoid coming in contact with it.
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  #42  
Old 05-30-2010, 10:24 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Is HPV testing the whole pap smear thing? *U@I& I hate those, but I get them at every annual physical regardless. Saskatchewan sends out "reminder" notices every year that it's time to get your pap smear. I wish they'd send out monthly breast exam reminders, because I always forget to do those...

edit... duh! e-mail reminders!
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  #43  
Old 05-31-2010, 07:32 PM
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pyxiegrl pyxiegrl is offline
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This thread is awesome! Thank you. This is one of my biggest concerns with anything. I do know this is why I am not a swinger nor am I big on just random gf or bf. My husband and I have both been tested but I always worry about EVERYONE ELSE.

Though I know we're not ready to jump into another relationship, I will probably make my hubbbie get on here as we talk more.
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  #44  
Old 07-16-2010, 01:28 AM
marksbabygirl marksbabygirl is offline
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Default Sex and dating

What constitutes sex for you? Kisses, mutual masturbation, intercourse, anal, oral?

What constitutes fluid bonded? Kissing? mutual masturbation? bareback intercourse? oral?

How important is fluid bonding when it comes to your new partners?

Where, in a relationship do you talk about fluid bonding and how does that affect you in your dating?
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  #45  
Old 07-16-2010, 01:32 AM
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Default Fluid Bonding

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fluid_bonding

Definition..
  • a process in Polymer science
  • a form of Bareback (sex)
  • an agreement between partners in a polyamorous relationship to practice unprotected sexual intercourse. This is usually undertaken once medical advice and STI tests have been taken. The agreement usually includes an agreement to practice protected sex outside of those within the fluid bonded relationship.
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  #46  
Old 07-16-2010, 01:48 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Passionate kissing is the highest form of sexuality for me.

If it involves erogenous zones and sexual stimulation..it's sex

I don't believe in the concept of mutual masturbation...if you are getting off together...it's sex

I define Fluid bonding as the uninhibited exchange of saliva, vaginal secretions and sperm.

Fluid bonding is paramount to sex for me. Sex is an exchange of energy and communication for me. This is reduced with someone I cannot consume and be inside of without barriers.
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  #47  
Old 07-16-2010, 02:27 AM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marksbabygirl View Post
What constitutes sex for you? Kisses, mutual masturbation, intercourse, anal, oral?
Interesting question. I suppose all of the above. I have gone a 48 hour period in the throws of sexual passion without having any intercourse. That was some of the best sex of my life.

Quote:
What constitutes fluid bonded? Kissing? mutual masturbation? bareback intercourse? oral?
Swapping seminal and vaginal fluids

Quote:
How important is fluid bonding when it comes to your new partners?
Tough question...for a relationship as in someone I am dating, ideally this will eventually happen especially if I am developing a strong emotional bond. But I do judge this per person. How responsible are they. Testing, willingness to test and how honest they are in general.

Quote:
Where, in a relationship do you talk about fluid bonding and how does that affect you in your dating?
The second I start talking about sex. I like to lay this on the table and discuss what people are interested in. If it is condoms only, fine...fluid bonding, then there is some serious discussion to follow.

On that note, I have not fluid bonded with many people, and I am a gy who hates condoms. I find them annoying at the best of times and painful at the worst.
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  #48  
Old 03-17-2011, 12:38 AM
Freetime Freetime is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
Passionate kissing is the highest form of sexuality for me.

If it involves erogenous zones and sexual stimulation..it's sex

I don't believe in the concept of mutual masturbation...if you are getting off together...it's sex

I define Fluid bonding as the uninhibited exchange of saliva, vaginal secretions and sperm.

Fluid bonding is paramount to sex for me. Sex is an exchange of energy and communication for me. This is reduced with someone I cannot consume and be inside of without barriers.

Wow. Thank you for this. Passionate Kissing is the #1 foreplay/sex act I love. Don't get me wrong, it's all good stuff, but that act in and of itself drives me crazy. Since my wife started her Poly journey and after this week our sex life has gone into overdrive.

Great thread for a new guy like me to read.

FT
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  #49  
Old 03-17-2011, 02:01 AM
Tonberry Tonberry is online now
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Quote:
Originally Posted by marksbabygirl View Post
What constitutes sex for you? Kisses, mutual masturbation, intercourse, anal, oral?
Hugs and kisses count as intimacy for me, as does lying next to one another, sitting on one's lap, or basically any form of contact. The more you touch, the more you can feel connected, in my experience.

For me, sex is when the contact, rather than relaxing and soothing you, has the opposite effect of excitement, accelerated heartbeat and so on. So, kissing can qualify as either I would say. Mutual masturbation, or self-masturbation while communicating (be it by phone, over the Internet, in person, etc) count as sex, as do intercourse, anal sex and oral sex. For me, these are always in the "my heartbeat gets faster and I'm sexually aroused" category, while kisses can be or not.

For that reason, I would probably count kisses and caresses as foreplay, because they might lead to sex or not, they might be sexual or not. All of the rest I would consider to be the "main dish".

Quote:
Originally Posted by marksbabygirl View Post
What constitutes fluid bonded? Kissing? mutual masturbation? bareback intercourse? oral?
Fluid bonded is when there is an exchange of fluids with no barriers. It doesn't need to be a reciprocal exchange, for instance with masturbating a partner, you get their fluids on your hand while not "exchanging" anything yourself. Fluids would include saliva, vaginal secretion, pre-come and ejaculate. I guess pre-come might count as ejaculate too?
I think I would count lubricant too. In some acts that can be the only fluid (manual-anal for instance) yet if both partners are in contact with the same lubricant, that still feels more intimate than using a barrier. In that case the lubricant isn't part of either partner, but it serves to link them regardless, and in a way becomes part of both of them... if I'm making sense.

Quote:
Originally Posted by marksbabygirl View Post
How important is fluid bonding when it comes to your new partners?
Fluid bonding is important to me, but less important than the health of my partners (the current ones or the new ones). I would want to switch to fluid bonded as early as possible if it is safe and possible (if I had a partner that I don't get to see very often, I probably wouldn't feel comfortable having unprotected sex with them).

Quote:
Originally Posted by marksbabygirl View Post
Where, in a relationship do you talk about fluid bonding and how does that affect you in your dating?
Well, I haven't had a lot of serious relationships, and they both started long distance, so there was a lot of time to talk about that. I assume I would talk before having sex the first time, be it only to make sure we're on the same page about having protected sex at first (unless we have 3 months ahead to get tested and don't get new partners in the meantime. In which case I would do that first and be fluid bonded from the first time).

If I couldn't be fully fluid bonded with someone, I think being able to kiss them would make it easier to cope with, because that would create the intimacy that fluid bonding does (as it's a form of fluid bonding, and a pretty safe one too, comparatively).
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  #50  
Old 11-09-2011, 06:09 PM
leslie leslie is offline
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Default Herpes

I have a question about herpes. My partner has just begun a relationship with a trans woman who has herpes. My partner has a pretty active case of psoriasis with sores on his legs and arms. Psoriasis is not a contagious disease, but I am concerned about the partner with Herpes infecting my partner.
I am trying to get good information about this, but find everything a bit overwhelming. Somethings say people have inactive herpes, but you can still get infected, even if it is not an active case. I am confused. Any thoughts about how they can have safe sex?
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