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  #21  
Old 08-28-2011, 01:57 PM
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just3 just3 is offline
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Yeah I called him a few names myself. Hes not arguing about the fact it was stupid and he is wrong. He says he panicked and didnt know what to do when confronted. I reminded him of a time a few years back that he asked me if I was talking to a ex of mine and I was honest and said yes. Whats the point of lying? I hate lying. Its just a stupid thing. If you feel the need to hide shit or lie.. YOU SHOULDNT BE DOING IT! Im still mad. More depressed hurt now. I honestly..Have no clue as what to do. Funny thing he actually offered to go to marriage counseling this time. when in the past it was always a Im not telling a stranger anything blah blah. I turned it down because...well Now Im over here just in a spot thinking... how many other lies or hiding shit is there? Is there ANYWAY Im gonna trust him? And should I just walk away.... Like I told him.. I have spent so long being the stay at home mom. Always here doing everything since he worked full time and I know he was tired. I have never had a decent car because when we do have one he takes it since hes got the full time job and has to go further. Im looking for full time employment as close to here as possible. And am hoping in the next 6 month or so I will have a decent vehicle. Other than that Im just lost in trying to figure out where to go from here.
He has all the info for this site as well as all others I have put stuff on. Hes offered all his passwords etc for any site he is on and honestly I dont want them. I dont like the fact that its him panicking about me walking out the door that has him wanting to hand over info. This is not the first time hes lied or hid stuff Im sure it wont be the last. Now its just up to me to figure out how much Im gonna believe or if I care enough anymore..
Chris
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  #22  
Old 08-28-2011, 02:56 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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Take him up on the offer of marriage counceling! It can seriously help in all the areas you mentioned. When we finally went, I was days away from filing divorce paperwork, in fact, I put it off until we met with the councelor. Part of what we were able to work on was developing a real partnership, when it came to household chorse, house and car maintenance and the kids, etc. This was a really big deal. I had been complaining about it and building resentment for years, but it took that 3rd party for him to see it was a real problem that he can't just tune out.
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Old 08-28-2011, 04:13 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Sure, take him up on the marriage counseling and pay someone else the big bucks to listen to him lie more.
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  #24  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:26 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by NeonKaos View Post
Sure, take him up on the marriage counseling and pay someone else the big bucks to listen to him lie more.
Honestly...I was thinking about that too. Coming up with the money thats better spent feeding my kids to listen to him try to justify lying.. or lie more. I think this is something he needs to figure out and for once I cant say do this this and this and maybe things will be ok. I have no clue how this will be fixed this time because I dont know how I can trust him again. In all these years I guess I thought he knew me better than this.
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Old 08-29-2011, 01:47 AM
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BrigidsDaughter BrigidsDaughter is offline
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Don't look at it as paying someone to listen to him lie.... think of it as an opportunity to learn to understand each other better; to be better people for each other and your kids. Kids are the first ones to pick up when something is wrong with mom and dad, so don't do it for him or yourself; do it for your kids.
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  #26  
Old 08-29-2011, 01:51 AM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by just3 View Post
Honestly...I was thinking about that too. Coming up with the money thats better spent feeding my kids to listen to him try to justify lying.. or lie more. I think this is something he needs to figure out and for once I cant say do this this and this and maybe things will be ok. I have no clue how this will be fixed this time because I dont know how I can trust him again. In all these years I guess I thought he knew me better than this.
C
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Originally Posted by BrigidsDaughter View Post
Don't look at it as paying someone to listen to him lie.... think of it as an opportunity to learn to understand each other better; to be better people for each other and your kids.

No, do look at it as paying someone to listen to him lie. He has to want to change for HIMSELF, not for you and/or the kids.

Last edited by NeonKaos; 08-29-2011 at 01:54 AM.
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  #27  
Old 11-07-2011, 03:50 AM
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I wont say things have changed in the past couple months. Hours JUST went back to Normal a week ago so no talking has been done at all. Lots of apologies but no discussions. I have felt like he put our relationship on the back burner. Since it took him 2 months to even start to talk to me.Im having trouble forgiving and forgetting..I am sure that eventually we will be ok. I was really frustrated 2 weeks ago when he decided he would finally say something to me and it was the same lame ass excuses. But now he seems to be trying to make a effort instead of ignoring it and hoping it will just go away. He even had my best friend over here tonight to celebrate my bday(he actually did this all on his own) And well..normally I plan my own bday if its even somewhat celebrated so its a big step lol. Hope things will get better soon. I hate living in silence.
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