Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG
I'll be honest - people say "kissing" is fine but we are all adults here. What does kissing actually entail?
If you're kissing with a DADT policy then you might as well be having intercourse...because that is where this is leading in my opinion.
Mono, you're totally right about this, but I don't know what to do about it. For me personally there is an enormous wall in place when it comes to actual intercourse, and I know it's pretty much impossible for me to get carried away and cross it. (I'm not one to get drunk or otherwise lose my control.) Of course, the land between kissing and intercourse is vast and interesting, and I can't say I haven't forayed into it on occasion. To my own conscience it gets pretty clear if I'm going too far. There is always, always a temptation to keep testing and pushing those boundaries, but I don't know how to turn that temptation off. Even making up my mind not to kiss yesterday, it became such an erotically charged denial -we'd be talking and he'd start giving longing looks to my mouth, once in a while leaning in to brush his cheek against mine seductively.
I suppose the puritanical stance is to steer altogether clear of each other. While I could potentially handle that with my more recent friend, I would definitely never give up the one who has been in my life for 20 years. The other extreme is giving in and having sex, but even horny little me doesn't truly feel right about extramarital sex (unless it happened for both of us maybe, but he'd never want to sleep with a woman without marrying her). So I walk this fuzzy middle ground, because it seems like the only option.