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Old 09-02-2011, 10:02 PM
JnR's Avatar
JnR JnR is offline
Join Date: Apr 2011
Location: Central Coast, Ca
Posts: 46

Well I scored really high (10) on physical touch and (9) on quality time. Actually makes sense to me Will be fun to have hubby take it tonight and see... I think he will actually score high on those two as well, but will be fun to see regardless
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Old 09-03-2011, 02:34 AM
schtuff schtuff is offline
Join Date: Aug 2011
Posts: 20

as predicted my wife took the test and here are the results.
me her
8 7 Words of Affirmation
8 8 Quality Time
1 3 Receiving Gifts
2 9 Acts of Service
11 3 Physical Touch

this does give me something to work on. i have been doing more around the house to help out and make me more active. even after messing up last week, we are on a better track.

knowledge is power, but understanding is the key.

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Old 09-03-2011, 12:07 PM
trueRiver trueRiver is offline
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Manchester, England & Tain, Scotland
Posts: 85


Thanks for posting this: I found the 'husband' and 'single' options quite useful, even though I am neither.

Some of the pairs were quite hard to decide; whereas all the pairs involving touch were obvious. As a polyaffectionate poly it was no surprise that I like touch: that this 'langiage' came out on top.

For me the interesting results were the ordering of the other items.

What was even more surprising for me were my feelings while doing the 'Apology Language' test: which works a bit differently (there are several options for each situation, rather than just a pair). For several of the situations I had a strong feeling of 'i wish someone would say that to me'

I think that knowing what our partners want, both in terms of offering love and in terms of offering apologies, could be very useful. I agree with SourGirl that these may vary between partners, and what I think would be most useful would be to see what a particular partner scores when they are specifically thinking of their relationship with me throughout the test.

There are two Rivers here now: which one is this?

quaker poly experiences and poly: a quaker perspective

I hope other British Quakers who are poly (or wonder if they are) will contact me here, thanks, Friends.

Last edited by trueRiver; 09-03-2011 at 12:29 PM.
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Old 09-04-2011, 04:01 AM
openbj's Avatar
openbj openbj is offline
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Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: OK, USA (but our hearts remain in TX)
Posts: 102

I love this book!! J and I read it years ago and we've always recommended it to our friends. There's also a 5 Love Languages for teens to help parents relate and express their love more effectively with their children. We have both. There's a lot of insight into everyday relationships through these books. If I remember correctly, he even talks about it not just being for married relationships, but is useful in work environments and so on. If you know better how to deal with the people around you, it becomes a lot more peaceful and enjoyable environment. I just can't remember if I read that in one of the books or if he said it in an interview about the books. Very psychological and insightful.
Married 12 1/2 years. Female. Straight. New to poly.
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book recommendations, love languages, love style, personality test

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