Less interested in sex with SO; does this happen often during strong NRE for another?

[marksbabygirl]

Originally Posted by NeonKaos

LOL something's seriously wrong with me. What would that be, then?

I get a buzz off of being cranky and contemptuous, so don't parade on my rain.

You're just special

[NeonKaos]

OK, in the interest of scientific research, I asked my husband if he minded if I thought about other people while I'm fucking him. He gave me the this-must-be another-one-of-those-wacky-questions-from-that-forum-you-moderate look, and said "Of course not. I always assumed you did anyway."

[NeonKaos]

Originally Posted by marksbabygirl

You're just special

Thanks but I don't think i'm special, at least not because i'm an asshole.

[redpepper]

I have gone through many changes sexually with my husband of 10 years. Every new person that comes along has caused a shift in my desire for him... I do my best to not read into it too much and just keep checking in on how I feel about him. I still love him immensely, so I don't worry, it all comes around. I am interested to see what happens with Mono... we have sex almost daily and that has been the case for over two years now. When we don't have it I feel loss. When we were first together and in NRE we spent hours and hours and I felt as the OP did, immediately turned on just to see him. I had sex with my husband then and enjoyed the closeness and his difference. We reached a new level of richness as a result.

All the dynamics around sex are just as important as everything else going on... one person feel a desperate need to be close, to pull away, to bring something new into an established sex life can shift everything. I have found it just easier to go with it, be honest, yet kind and caring, push myself sometimes to be intimate when I initially don't feel like it and to be firm when I really don't want to... sometimes its necessary to give to my partners when they need me and sometimes I have to give to myself by saying no, or because I am soooo into them. Weighing it all out and keeping balance in ones sex life is just as important as all the other aspects to creating a successful relationship dynamic with several people.

[neohio44122]

Originally Posted by NeonKaos

Geez. Of course I don't say to one partner I'm fucking that I'm thinking about someone else. And I don't "fake" or "feign" interest. Sheesh. Believe it or not, some people actually ARE turned on by the idea of their partner thinking about or having sex with someone else. I don't rub it in their faces though.

You probably think watching porn is "cheating" too.

It doesn't bother me that my wife thinks about her bf during sex, it kind of turns me on. Sometimes I ask her what she thinking about, she always tell me the truth. I've been in a poly mono relationship for 17 years, works for us. When she has a new bf, i give her some space and let the NRE play out. We have less sex while she going thru NRE, but when we do have sex its some of the best sex we have. I know she is thinking about her bf, but she fucks the hell out of me. Don't care what she thinking about,the sex is great.

[NeonKaos]

Originally Posted by neohio44122

It doesn't bother me that my wife thinks about her bf during sex, it kind of turns me on. Sometimes I ask her what she thinking about, she always tell me the truth. I've been in a poly mono relationship for 17 years, works for us. When she has a new bf, i give her some space and let the NRE play out. We have less sex while she going thru NRE, but when we do have sex its some of the best sex we have. I know she is thinking about her bf, but she fucks the hell out of me. Don't care what she thinking about,the sex is great.

It's not even about NRE for me, I just like to imagine I'm getting fucked by someone else with my husband's big dick.