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Old 09-01-2011, 08:01 PM
wannabe wannabe is offline
Join Date: Sep 2011
Posts: 9
Default How/when to bring up an interest in poly?

Hello all,

I've been interested, but never active, in poly relationships. Lets just say, there isn't really any scene for that where I'm living. Also I've never been involved in a very long term relationship, maybe 2 years is the longest I've done and I've been happy with one person for that short time. So I guess I could be mono, but I doubt it. I firmly believe we are not meant for long term monogamy.

Two months ago I started a long distance relationship with a guy I met in Feb this year. The distance is annoying but otherwise its fantastic, NRE abounds.

Here's my dilemma: He is all I am interested at the moment and likely for some time to come. I'm not looking, I'm very happy now and am pretty sure he has never even heard of polyamory.

I feel this person is someone I could have a long future with and feel that I need to say something to him about my interest in poly at some point. Otherwise its 'false advertising' ...or something. I would like to be open but its very early days and in no way would I want him to feel that I was unsatisfied.

Am I obliged to disclose that I'm a 'theoretical' poly, or that I might eventually be interested in having a sexual relationship with someone else?
If so, when?

If you were in my shoes, what would you do? Especially since I'm not even sure that if he insisted on mono that it would be a dealbreaker for me.

thanks for listening!

Ms W
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coming out, coming out poly, communication, dating, disclosure, help sought, ldr, long distance love, new and confused, new to poly

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