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  #1  
Old 10-12-2009, 01:18 AM
nalena nalena is offline
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Red face Hello All

Hello everyone,

I am new to "poly" and this forum. A friend of mine brought up the topic and I started to do some research on what it was and how I felt about it. It seems the more I read, the more I am interested.

A little about myself. I have been with my husband now for 17 years, been married for 5 of those, but seems most of the time I have not been either happy with him, myself or our relationship. I have always yearned for something more. We have talked numerous times about having an open relationship, but each time I seem to find someone to be friends and more with, but then my Husband retracts the offer and leaves me out in the cold.

I am hoping I learn more here, both for me, my husband and our relationship. As a friend once told me. You can't be truly happy, unless you are happy with yourself..
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Old 10-12-2009, 03:28 AM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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Welcome to the boards.

I hope you're aware that you've got a tough row to hoe. Usually, adding more people to a relationship that isn't working well is a recipe for disaster, so unless you and your husband are working together on settling your issues, things will only get trickier if you try to add other people.

I wish you the best.
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Old 10-12-2009, 04:07 AM
Mark1npt Mark1npt is offline
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I can echo SC's words.....I maybe rushed the threesome, before repairing my own marriage, and that didn't work so well. We are under repair currently and the threesome is starting to flourish more. Just sayin'......
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Old 10-12-2009, 05:36 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is online now
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The webs we weave.
Hi Nalena.
Can't say I really expected to see you here.
Anyway-welcome and I hope you find helpful information as you peruse the boards.
I know we have.
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  #5  
Old 10-21-2009, 12:09 AM
nalena nalena is offline
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Default Sorry I went off the grid

I am sorry I have not responded to any responses before now. If I did not say say in my first post I am a full-time college student. I am taking two classes in class and one online/in class so I am pretty busy. Thank you for taking your time to let me know there will be problems.

A little update we have been talking some, but he still does not understand that I am not happy. It is not that I am unhappy in our relationship, just never been happy with myself.

Well time to go back to the grind and get more papers done.
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Old 10-21-2009, 02:39 AM
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Well my dear-the first step then is to look inward at yourself and identify why. All the way down to the bottom of why. Not "I'm insecure" or "I feel worthless" but all the way back to the very primary reason those feelings exist in yourself.
Only you can make yourself happy. No one else in the world can do it for you.
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Old 10-25-2009, 02:44 AM
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Legion Legion is offline
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yeah, not being happy with yourself is a tough one. And I don't think adding another person will help that any more than it would help if it were your relationship you were unhappy with.

I speak from the other side, having had a couple g/fs who were not happy with themselvs. It is true that you are the only one who can help yourself. I know I loved my "Athena" like crazy but it was like pouring water into a bucket with a hole in it. She just kept feeling empty because she didn't feel worthy of the love, so she couldn't accept it.

I wish you luck in discovering how precious you are and learning to cherish yourself!!
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Old 10-26-2009, 03:44 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Mark1npt View Post
I can echo SC's words.....I maybe rushed the threesome, before repairing my own marriage, and that didn't work so well. We are under repair currently and the threesome is starting to flourish more. Just sayin'......
Hey, it's Mark!! Hi my friend!...ummmm and Nalena!!
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Old 10-26-2009, 03:54 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MonoVCPHG View Post
Hey, it's Mark!! Hi my friend!...ummmm and Nalena!!
Um... mono??????
What the heck does that mean? I'm so damn lost now!
steps away to scratch my head.... waiting for reply.
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Old 10-26-2009, 03:55 AM
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Ok sorry-I get it now-had to reread. SORRYYYYYYYY MONO!!!!!!!!
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