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  #1  
Old 10-08-2009, 08:51 PM
Polyphemus Polyphemus is offline
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Diary style post.

We've been married for 10 years. I've always thought that open relationships were a good idea, my wife scoffed the first time I mentioned it. But we have experimented with others, which we now regret. We've had crushes on other people, but hadn't really felt the NRE with anyone else... until recently.

I think she's in love, but she doesn't call it that. She says it's a just a big crush, & she's obsessed with him. When this started, I could tell something new was up, but we hadn't been able to put it in words. I really freaked out a couple of times, including crying, depression, really bad thoughts, I felt betrayed. I had done a lot of reading on the subject, and I was surprised I reacted that way.

I'm doing better in that dept now. I'm very supportive, and I believe my jealously is under control. I do have to reassure myself when I get bad thoughts. But I've always really wanted this, and I'm working on it.

We have a wonderful relationship, great communication. We have no secrets. We support each other.

She can't be with her new crush because he and her best friend are a couple and her best friend said she doesn't want to share. That makes he very sad, and she's often depressed about it. This brings me down too sometimes.

Thanks for this space. I love this community.
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  #2  
Old 10-08-2009, 09:07 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Does this guy know she has a crush on him? Wlecome to the forums BTW!
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  #3  
Old 10-08-2009, 09:34 PM
Polyphemus Polyphemus is offline
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Yep, they've chatted quite a bit, sometimes quite steamy chats. They prolly could have had sex about a month ago, but that was when I had a bout of depression, and I asked for the relationship to be closed for a while.
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  #4  
Old 10-08-2009, 09:40 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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I'm glad they respected that...how does his girlfriend come into play? If she is not willing to share how would they have had sex regardless? Is he thinking of ending his relationship to pursue a poly path?
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  #5  
Old 10-09-2009, 08:02 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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welcome to the forum.
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  #6  
Old 10-09-2009, 01:24 PM
Polyphemus Polyphemus is offline
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Thanks for the welcome. I found this place two days ago and I thinks it's soooo awesome.

He had just broken up with his old girlfriend, and he told my Nin about it. Two days later Nins best friend swooped in. There was a small window were they could have gotten together. Nin resents me a tiny bit for the missed opportunity. Which upsets me.

On this forum, do most people have primary and secondary relationships? Or do most think things should always be as equal as possible?
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