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Old 03-06-2011, 09:55 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Default Suggestion for new section of the Forum

Quote:
Originally Posted by SNeacail View Post
Sent my husband a link to start researching poly and light BDSM.
This just reminded me... I've often thought that a separate forum here for "BDSM and Poly" would be a good idea. There are lots of people newly discovering both polyamory and this site who might find all the BDSM talk that gets intertwined here in poly topics a bit off-putting. It is a subset, I think, not an automatic part of being poly.

I don't wish to offend anyone into BDSM, but I personally find it frustrating when someone posts a question about poly relationships that looks interesting or like something I can relate to, from seeing the subject, and then I read it and it's about a Master/Slave dynamic or some BDSM flavor that I cannot wrap my head around nor contribute to. Not to say that my input is needed in every thread -- I don't mean to come off as that arrogant. And I know it's a personal prejudice of mine, possibly coming from IDing as a feminist, that makes me bristle when I read a woman calling someone Master, people talk about humiliating their partner, or capitalizing the words "He" and "Him" when referring to their mate, even though I know it's all consensual -- and so my bias is certainly something I am willing to look at, as well as learning more about BDSM. I'm fairly open-minded and yet admit to having my own inhibitions.

But I still think it could be a good idea to have a distinct area for BDSM, simply in order to make the General Discussion and New to Polyamory sections more appealing to a wider group of newbies. Plus I am sure there are plenty of experienced poly people not interested in any aspect of BDSM, who don't want to read about it, and plenty of people into BDSM who might appreciate a dedicated space for discussing it. Just a thought. Anyone else think this is a good idea?
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An excellent blog post on hierarchy in polyamory:
solopoly.net/2014/10/31/why-im-not-a-secondary-partner-the-short-version/

Last edited by nycindie; 03-06-2011 at 09:59 PM.
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Old 03-06-2011, 11:51 PM
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thumbs up for this one... same reasons too
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Old 03-07-2011, 03:16 PM
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Yup, Same reasons too.
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Old 03-07-2011, 03:20 PM
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Yep.
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Old 03-07-2011, 03:23 PM
Melnkof Melnkof is offline
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Have to agree.
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Old 03-09-2011, 06:50 PM
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I'm no longer a moderator or administrator here, so I'm not privy to any "official" talk regarding the above recommendation. It would be nice to know if the suggestion is being considered.
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