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  #1  
Old 01-29-2014, 03:43 AM
Kimk010514 Kimk010514 is offline
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Unhappy Dating married poly couple

I'm making this thread to see has anyone dealt with married couple that is poly I'm currently dating a married poly couple and we have some issues in our relationship.. The married couple both work but different shifts the wife works days and the husband works midnight so I'm stuck in the middle I spend more time with the husband then. His wife does and that is putting a damper on thing and the wife is more into her phone then into me or her husband so if anyone has any advice please feel free to respond
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:10 AM
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Inyourendo Inyourendo is offline
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So what's the problem? Is the wife acting out because you get more time with the husband?
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Sue, openly in a vee with Nate (polysexual, many fwb) and Sam (Mono)
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:17 AM
Kimk010514 Kimk010514 is offline
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Yeah she does act out that i spend more time with with her husband then she does.. Just like I told her husband it ain't my fault that she does not go in the room and wake up her husband when she gets home from work.... I just want us all to be on the same page in our relationship i don't know what the different letters mean just yet so if I could explain
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:30 AM
PolyinPractice PolyinPractice is offline
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Remind him and her that each dyad in the polyship is separate; that is, each relationship between two people (you and him, him and her, him and you, her and you) is unique. If the relationship between him and her is suffering, that should not be confused with the relationship between you and him.

Or you can find a couple with less insecurity and drama. If you love him, though, and he loves you...well, pick your battles
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Old 01-29-2014, 04:35 AM
Kimk010514 Kimk010514 is offline
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What does so letters mean like JFK mff and so on
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Old 01-29-2014, 08:49 AM
FarAwayLover FarAwayLover is offline
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Smile Glossary

Hi Kim,

Quote:
Originally Posted by Kimk010514 View Post
What does so letters mean like JFK mff and so on
There's a Glossary with definitions here: http://www.polyamory.com/forum/showthread.php?t=1720

I'm new enough that I'm not going to try and define anything - I'll probably mess it up!

Welcome aboard!

FAL

--------------------------------

M - Me female, 59 - _trying_ to figure out if I'm poly
B - 56 - my husband for over 34 years
JP - 58 - my high school boyfriend, newly appeared in the picture after 38 years; very long distance; haven't actually seen him
A - 65? - JP's wife of over 30 years, who's not cool with things
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Old 01-29-2014, 07:06 PM
monkeystyle monkeystyle is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by PolyinPractice View Post
If the relationship between him and her is suffering, that should not be confused with the relationship between you and him.)
Easier said than done, people tend to get incredibly stupid when one half of their relationship is in trouble. Projecting, transferring, cowboying, ignoring, etc. But it's a nice thought, even if in practice it's not generally fact.
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Old 01-29-2014, 09:39 PM
Kimk010514 Kimk010514 is offline
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I feel like their relationship is in trouble since I have been in the picture but I have asked over and over again and they both said their marriage is not in trouble
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Old 02-01-2014, 04:30 AM
Kimk010514 Kimk010514 is offline
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All i got to say is fuck my life
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Old 02-03-2014, 05:35 AM
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Brighty18 Brighty18 is offline
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This may sound like an odd question, but how does the wife feel about her job? And her husband's job? And your schedule?

I am asking because I have been in a slightly similar situation (as the wife who resents the time the other two spent together), and I came to realize that the heart of the issue was NOT the amount of time A. (my legal husband) and C. (our wonderful partner) were spending together, but that is was that I hated my job and my schedule. I was feeling stressed and over-worked and sometimes resented the many hours of free time they had together. I had my time with A. and C. and we had our times altogether, but I worked more hours than they did combined. A. works part time and C. didn't have a job at all. I was fortunate enough to change jobs and now I LOVE what I do, so things are a lot better.

All I am suggesting is that the wife's resentment could have other roots.
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