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  #1  
Old 06-19-2013, 07:08 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Default Finding That Elusive Female Orgasm

Ok-I have a friend (not me THANK YOU GOD) who is struggling.

She can't orgasm during intercourse-and believes it means she's "broken". Completely can't believe that a large majority of women can't.

She orgasms fine with toys. But, her husband is jealous and angry about her using them. (I know-that's a topic for later).

He expects her to give him oral and manual stimulation as well as intercourse. But-he won't perform manually or orally on her and doesn't appreciate the toy use... (again-respect issue I already started addressing)

BUT-can anyone guide me to INTELLIGENT articles, medical journals, blogs ANYTHING that is not bullshit-to share with her so she can't start realizing that this bs in her head IS bs..?
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Old 06-19-2013, 07:24 AM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
Ok-I have a friend (not me THANK YOU GOD) who is struggling.

She can't orgasm during intercourse-and believes it means she's "broken". Completely can't believe that a large majority of women can't.

She orgasms fine with toys. But, her husband is jealous and angry about her using them. (I know-that's a topic for later).

He expects her to give him oral and manual stimulation as well as intercourse. But-he won't perform manually or orally on her and doesn't appreciate the toy use... (again-respect issue I already started addressing)

BUT-can anyone guide me to INTELLIGENT articles, medical journals, blogs ANYTHING that is not bullshit-to share with her so she can't start realizing that this bs in her head IS bs..?
Do you really want me to Google That For You™? I mean, would it be faster? I know you get internet by dogsled up where you are, but it IS the same internet?

Sorry but it's late, i'm home, i'm high... you know... Captain Obvious and all that..
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  #3  
Old 06-19-2013, 07:27 AM
london london is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LovingRadiance View Post
Ok-I have a friend (not me THANK YOU GOD) who is struggling.

She can't orgasm during intercourse-and believes it means she's "broken". Completely can't believe that a large majority of women can't.

She orgasms fine with toys. But, her husband is jealous and angry about her using them. (I know-that's a topic for later).

He expects her to give him oral and manual stimulation as well as intercourse. But-he won't perform manually or orally on her and doesn't appreciate the toy use... (again-respect issue I already started addressing)

BUT-can anyone guide me to INTELLIGENT articles, medical journals, blogs ANYTHING that is not bullshit-to share with her so she can't start realizing that this bs in her head IS bs..?
I'd start with divorce lawyers in her area.
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Old 06-19-2013, 07:31 AM
BoringGuy BoringGuy is offline
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Is this the same one who had the "psychological disconnect between sex and emotion" a few years ago?
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Old 06-19-2013, 10:24 AM
wildflowers wildflowers is offline
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Here's just one, LR. I think there's a bunch out there about this book, as well as the book itself. I'm sure there's plenty of other sources too; this is just one I happen to remember.

http://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/...tory-vibrators

If I remember right you can see the first chapter of the book or an intro or something on Amazon. The author's description of being an academic who does research on vibrators was pretty funny. I wasn't motivated enough to read the whole book.

http://www.amazon.com/The-Technology...logy+of+orgasm
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  #6  
Old 06-19-2013, 11:26 AM
Nadya Nadya is offline
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Here is one link, hopefully somewhat helpful:

http://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-re...secrets-341090

An interview with a sexual educator from Sweden. Apparently her book has not been translated into English, which is a shame. The title is promising: "Orgasm More Often" -- maybe one day someone will translate it, who knows.
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  #7  
Old 06-19-2013, 12:04 PM
Josie Josie is offline
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This is an article rather than an official study but makes some good points:

http://www.netdoctor.co.uk/menshealt...ithorgasms.htm

Especially in this paragraph:

So, try not to give the impression to your female partner that she ‘ought’ to be able to climax through intercourse alone and that that is what you think of as ‘proper sex’. The sex menu can be a varied one.

I know that the experience of one person may not mean much or go that far is convincing her that she's normal, but I also have a lot of trouble. Even with manual and/or oral stimulation, less than 10% of my partners have been able to make me come, and until my current boyfriend, I was pretty sure it was never going to happen. I've definitely never come from sex alone - it would be an impossibility. It think this is the case for a lot of women, from my own experience talking to people about it, it's quite rare for a woman to be able to come without any clitoral stimulation.
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  #8  
Old 06-20-2013, 02:26 PM
northhome northhome is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Nadya View Post
Here is one link, hopefully somewhat helpful:

http://www.elle.com/life-love/sex-re...secrets-341090
Ylva does great work and her book is excellent (I speak Swedish). She also gives courses - contact her directly to find out more.

http://www.orgasmeramera.se
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  #9  
Old 06-20-2013, 05:08 AM
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LovingRadiance LovingRadiance is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BoringGuy View Post
Is this the same one who had the "psychological disconnect between sex and emotion" a few years ago?
giggle-no but it's funny you mentioned that-this person and that person seem to be similar in some regards and polar opposite in others. BUT ANYWAY-
I did google it. :P
I also posted a bunch of info for her. But, I have found that these... mmmm... alternative lifestyle communities tend to have a wealth of more intelligent and useful info about sex than most places-so I figured I may as well ask.
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Old 06-19-2013, 11:21 AM
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I'd start with divorce lawyers in her area.
Word!
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