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Old 11-30-2010, 06:21 AM
FitChick FitChick is offline
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Question Navigating Holiday periods

My bf and I are in a LDR and he also has 4 children with 2 different women,whereas I have none. I understand that Christmas is primarily for the children but he is spending the holidays(Christmas and NYE) with his ex wife,ex girlfriend and their children and there is no room for me.

I've never really been a 'Christmas' person anyway but this scenario is making me feel worse,given the fresh nature of the baby and ex girlfriend. I understand that the children come first and he needs to remain amicable with the exes,that's a given, but I'm finding it hard to separate out his relationship with the new baby and his ex,given that several of the significant holiday days are ones he will be spending with them..

I guess I'm feeling left out..

Any suggestions/ideas?
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Old 11-30-2010, 05:32 PM
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polychronopolous polychronopolous is offline
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Yikes, that's a tough situation in many ways. First he has an obligation to his children then add to it the fact that he has kids from two mothers and the schedule becomes far more demanding. Being in a LDR can be a challenge in itself. Is there any you can travel to where he is for holidays?

Phoenix.
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Old 11-30-2010, 08:48 PM
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Breathesgirl Breathesgirl is offline
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Only slightly related reply but :

Breathes and I, mostly I, are having a fun time arranging the Christmas family get togethers this year, lol. One family is Christmas Day, the other Boxing Day (day after Christmas) & we're currently unsure as to when the chosen family non-Christmas get together will be as I'm awaiting replies from a few people.

Is there any way you could arrange a different time for the two of you to get together for your Christmas?
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Old 11-30-2010, 08:59 PM
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SNeacail SNeacail is offline
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We have to do holiday musical chairs all the time, especially when we decide to travel to one family member or another. Lately, we have actually chosen to travel on Christmas Day, because someone ususally has to work the next day and the traffic is MUCH better. It turns into about a weeks worth of Holiday Dinners and presents, 3 days before Christmas with one set of family, go home and do stuff with just the kids (and laundry), then off to another group of family members for a day or two.
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Old 11-30-2010, 10:31 PM
FitChick FitChick is offline
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I think that's what we're going to have to do,we're hoping to get together in january,both our schedules permitting,my work doesn't allow for holidays but I have a client flying in from the US in late January so I'm going to try and put together a birthday celebration for him then. I have a present organised for him and have already sent a present for the new baby,even though her mother and I don't get along. i think this is going to be a slow process due to the new baby and that I have to find ways of being more patient until that settles down...
In alot of ways I'm glad I don't live with him or have moved up there because it would have been too difficult to navigate the 'dislike' between me and the 'baby momma' at this point. I think we all need to be ready to sit down together and right now at Christmas,isn't a good time!
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Old 12-01-2010, 08:50 PM
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polychronopolous polychronopolous is offline
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Is your BF and the baby's mother still together? Because if not I don't see how her opinion of you matters much.
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