Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > General Poly Discussions

Notices

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old 06-11-2010, 02:46 PM
tinylove's Avatar
tinylove tinylove is offline
Member
 
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 39
Question How do you tell someone that...

You are Poly ? I find myself conflicted? There is this guy I really like I know he is single and probably mono but who knows. We only see each other once a week and it is rather short usually a "Hello, how are you?" and some quick little chats. Today we chatted a bit about my children. He knows that I am married and now I am thinking "How can a let him know I am available without it seeming like I want to cheat on my partner?"

We are never really in a situation where we can talk about things personally. I know he likes me it is pretty obvious.

So what do I do?
__________________
~ "Kindness in thought leads to wisdom. Kindness in speech leads to eloquence. Kindness in action leads to love."
- Lao-Tsu
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old 06-11-2010, 03:09 PM
SourGirl's Avatar
SourGirl SourGirl is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: South of an Igloo, North of a Desert.
Posts: 885
Default Just getting it out there,...

Hello tinylove,


I find that men who are interested in me, usually try to drop hints/compliments at the same time.

They will say things like, ' Ahh to bad you are married !', or " Your husband is a lucky man' or something to show me they find me interesting, or like me.

These gives me a chance to put it out there right away, without getting in to to much detail.

I`ll respond with something like ' Yes, I am happily married to a great man, but we are in a open relationship. If that has you curious, feel free to ask questions !'

From there you can usually read their face right away. Some people need to chew on it for a bit, some people ask questions right away.
If they appear as if they need to chew on those facts for awhile, I switch the conversation to something fun, and easy.

Good Luck
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old 06-11-2010, 03:39 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,868
Default

If you are on a fairly friendly level, maybe something as simple as meeting for coffee and then you can discuss it there.

I find I get a lot of very confused looks when I say poly, so I usually just say I am open. If they are open to my being open, I hope they ask questions and I can expand on that

Good luck
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old 06-11-2010, 03:59 PM
girlcaleb's Avatar
girlcaleb girlcaleb is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: The South
Posts: 66
Default

It's strange how so many folks have this problem... maybe I should just print out business cards that say "call me, I like you". If they call I can explain it to them... silly. It would never work

I just wish it were simple.
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old 06-11-2010, 04:06 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
Moderator
 
Join Date: Dec 2009
Posts: 2,868
Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by girlcaleb View Post
It's strange how so many folks have this problem... maybe I should just print out business cards that say "call me, I like you". If they call I can explain it to them... silly. It would never work

I just wish it were simple.
ACTUALLY...this sort of works. There is a conference for "picking up people into non-monogamy" (something like that anyways) and one of the tricks that they advocated was handing out business cards. If you are in a club and see someone you may like you could have something as simple as

"I am married but find you attractive, I am in an open relationship etc etc"...

Obviously won't work on 100% of the people, but it could be fun to give it a whirl.
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old 06-11-2010, 05:51 PM
girlcaleb's Avatar
girlcaleb girlcaleb is offline
Member
 
Join Date: May 2010
Location: The South
Posts: 66
Default

Sweet!!!
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT. The time now is 06:09 PM.