Polyamory.com Forum  

Go Back   Polyamory.com Forum > Polyamory > Introductions


Thread Tools Display Modes
Old 08-30-2012, 07:01 PM
sundevil sundevil is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Posts: 6
Default Greetings

Happy to have found a place to discuss poly.

I'm 42, married for 19 years, and have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 8 years (we just celebrated our anniversary). She is my first and only venture into poly (haven't been interested in anyone else). My wife and gf's husband were involved for a time, but things cooled off between them a while back and now they have more of a FWB arrangement. I'm very happy with both my loves, and am committed to them equally.

If there's been any difficulty, it's jealousy (of course). I get along with my girlfriend's husband, but there have been times over the years when his jealousy over the intensity of our (my girlfriend's and my) relationship has created turbulence. Such is life; nothing is ever completely free of static. So far we've managed to work through the issues reasonably well - after 8 years I should HOPE we've gotten adept at it.

Looking forward to jumping into the discussions here!
Reply With Quote
Old 08-30-2012, 07:12 PM
MusicalRose's Avatar
MusicalRose MusicalRose is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Central Ohio
Posts: 405

Welcome! I'm relatively new to the forums as well so I was just popping in to say hello and hopefully we will both be able to find a bit more community here.
Reply With Quote
Old 08-30-2012, 07:48 PM
Avatar Avatar is offline
Join Date: Aug 2012
Location: Bay Area
Posts: 78

Reply With Quote
Old 08-30-2012, 11:13 PM
kdt26417's Avatar
kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
Official Greeter
Join Date: Apr 2012
Location: Yelm, Washington
Posts: 13,335

Hello sundevil,
Welcome to our forum.

You're no newbie to this lovestyle, if you and your girlfriend have been together for eight years. It is good to have the benefit of your experience here.

No shortage of discussions to jump into, so dig right in; see what calls to you.

With regards,
Kevin T.
Love means never having to say, "Put down that meat cleaver!"
Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2012, 01:07 PM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: Pennsyl-tucky
Posts: 1,807

Welcome to the forum! So glad to see someone new here who has been in their poly situation for the long-term. 19 years with wife, 8 years with girlfriend - way to go - you guys are obviously doing something right and are an inspiration! Thanks for joining the site - I hope you find it a good place to continue to grow and and to share the insights you have garnered over the years with us.

Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" V-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (24+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (6+ yrs) and MrS's BFF
SLeW: platonic hetero girlfriend and BFF
MrClean: hetero mono male, almost lover-friend to me, FWBs to SLeW
+ "others" = FBs, FWBs, lover-friends, platonic G/BFs, boytoys, etc.

My poly blogs here:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
Reply With Quote
Old 09-01-2012, 06:48 PM
CielDuMatin's Avatar
CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2009
Location: Upstate New York, USA
Posts: 1,467

Welcome to the forum and congratulations on your relationships. So many say that poly relationships are inherently unstable, so it's great to see more examples of folks that are making it work.

Jealousy can definitely play a part - what work have you done (as a group) to identify what specifically is causing this? Usually jealousy is a sign of some need not being met, while they perceive that another (you) is getting what they need. You say it is usually about the intensity of the relationship - what aspects of the intensity bother him? is it the lovey-dovey stuff, or the intensity of the sex? How would you characterise it?

"Listen, or your tongue will make you deaf." - Native American Proverb
Reply With Quote

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump

All times are GMT. The time now is 11:53 AM.