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Old 08-30-2012, 07:01 PM
sundevil sundevil is offline
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Default Greetings

Happy to have found a place to discuss poly.

I'm 42, married for 19 years, and have been in a relationship with my girlfriend for 8 years (we just celebrated our anniversary). She is my first and only venture into poly (haven't been interested in anyone else). My wife and gf's husband were involved for a time, but things cooled off between them a while back and now they have more of a FWB arrangement. I'm very happy with both my loves, and am committed to them equally.

If there's been any difficulty, it's jealousy (of course). I get along with my girlfriend's husband, but there have been times over the years when his jealousy over the intensity of our (my girlfriend's and my) relationship has created turbulence. Such is life; nothing is ever completely free of static. So far we've managed to work through the issues reasonably well - after 8 years I should HOPE we've gotten adept at it.

Looking forward to jumping into the discussions here!
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Old 08-30-2012, 07:12 PM
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MusicalRose MusicalRose is online now
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Welcome! I'm relatively new to the forums as well so I was just popping in to say hello and hopefully we will both be able to find a bit more community here.
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  #3  
Old 08-30-2012, 07:48 PM
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Welcome
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Old 08-30-2012, 11:13 PM
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kdt26417 kdt26417 is offline
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Hello sundevil,
Welcome to our forum.

You're no newbie to this lovestyle, if you and your girlfriend have been together for eight years. It is good to have the benefit of your experience here.

No shortage of discussions to jump into, so dig right in; see what calls to you.

With regards,
Kevin T.
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Old 09-01-2012, 01:07 PM
JaneQSmythe JaneQSmythe is online now
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Welcome to the forum! So glad to see someone new here who has been in their poly situation for the long-term. 19 years with wife, 8 years with girlfriend - way to go - you guys are obviously doing something right and are an inspiration! Thanks for joining the site - I hope you find it a good place to continue to grow and and to share the insights you have garnered over the years with us.

JaneQ
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Me: poly bi female, in an "open-but-not-looking" Vee-plus with -
MrS: hetero polyflexible male, live-in husband (together 21+ yrs)
Dude: hetero poly male, live-in boyfriend (together 3+ yrs) and MrS's best friend
Lotus: poly bi female, "it's complicated" relationships with Dude/JaneQ/MrS
TT: poly bi male, married to Lotus, FB with JaneQ
VV and MsJ: bi-women with male primaries, LTR LDR FWBs to JaneQ


My poly blogs on this site:
The Journey of JaneQSmythe
The Notebook of JaneQSmythe
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Old 09-01-2012, 06:48 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Welcome to the forum and congratulations on your relationships. So many say that poly relationships are inherently unstable, so it's great to see more examples of folks that are making it work.

Jealousy can definitely play a part - what work have you done (as a group) to identify what specifically is causing this? Usually jealousy is a sign of some need not being met, while they perceive that another (you) is getting what they need. You say it is usually about the intensity of the relationship - what aspects of the intensity bother him? is it the lovey-dovey stuff, or the intensity of the sex? How would you characterise it?
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