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  #1  
Old 05-03-2010, 04:03 PM
ellie ellie is offline
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Default Confused? Frequency changing...

Need a bit of advice...

Looks like my partner wants to change the frequency we see each other, as we have been fighting alot lately (which has affected our bedroom habits).

We've been seeing each other about 4 days a week (one weekday and the weekend). Dating for a little over a year. I am the primary partner.

He just starting seeing someone else about 2 months ago...and wants to cut our time in half. Meaning go from 4 days down to 2 days. And seeing her 1 day during the week and leaving me for the weekend. He says his reasoning for this is more personal time for himself.

I am so used to seeing him during the week and weekends. I wouldn't mind seeing him 3 days but he thinks we need drastic measures. I just feel like she's the weekday girl and I'm the weekend girl.

I'm just a bit saddned and at a loss for words on what to do about the situation. Any thoughts would be appreicated

Last edited by NeonKaos; 05-03-2010 at 04:16 PM.
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  #2  
Old 05-03-2010, 04:21 PM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Perhaps broadening your own activities? Hobbies or maybe explore your own new relationships?

Just a thought.
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  #3  
Old 05-03-2010, 04:27 PM
ellie ellie is offline
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I have...we both have pretty busy lives (he works and is a musician on the side, and I have work and other things as well)...

I just wanted to see if this has ever happend to anyone and how they handled it. Considering this is first secondary, in the year we've been dating, (I've had a secondary partner before) I just felt a bit hurt by it I guess. I could fill up my time with many other things, I just had a nagging feeling this wasn't a good sign.
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Old 05-03-2010, 04:31 PM
NeonKaos NeonKaos is offline
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I would trust my gut feeling if I were you. It does sound like he might be trying to gradually wean himself out of the relationship with you, regardless of what may or may not be going on with other people.
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Old 05-03-2010, 04:40 PM
ellie ellie is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by YGirl View Post
I would trust my gut feeling if I were you. It does sound like he might be trying to gradually wean himself out of the relationship with you, regardless of what may or may not be going on with other people.
I started to feel that way, but he assures me that isn't the case. He's saying absence makes the heart grow fonder. And we are trying this for the month of May to see if it helps us fight less and get us back on track. (I do know he's been stressed out about work and other things). Just have the nagging feeling...and he's always told me the truth. So I'm trying to take it at face value. Just hard to do when someone else is involved.
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Old 05-03-2010, 04:44 PM
Ariakas Ariakas is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ellie View Post
I started to feel that way, but he assures me that isn't the case. He's saying absence makes the heart grow fonder. And we are trying this for the month of May to see if it helps us fight less and get us back on track. (I do know he's been stressed out about work and other things). Just have the nagging feeling...and he's always told me the truth. So I'm trying to take it at face value. Just hard to do when someone else is involved.
Having 2 people in his life, he may well need time to himself. I wouldn't read to much into it unless you start to see other signs.
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