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  #1  
Old 06-09-2012, 01:32 AM
hellokitty hellokitty is offline
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Default Facebook "partner" option

Hey,

This is kind of a silly topic but one I'm sure many of you have thought of! Any way, I've been with my bf for 5+ yrs so he has always been on my facebook profile as "in a relationship with ___." I've been w my gf for a yr & a half and she feels understandably as if she might seem less important to our friends (online)... But there's never really been much to do about it because fb is not quite so poly oriented. I was messing around on there today and noticed in the "friends and family" section one of the options to add someone as (under grandmother, aunt, cousin, etc..) is Partner. I'm wondering if it's possible to add her to that little section as partner and keep my bf where he is. I'm anxious to try it because I don't want something awkward to happen like it tell fb him and I broke up haha.

Anyone willing to be a guinea pig for curiosity's sake???

Thanks!
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Old 06-09-2012, 02:19 AM
feelyunicorn feelyunicorn is offline
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My FB option stays single regardless. I`ve never been pressured, but I`ve been through a lot of people since I joined Face and never have I touched the relationship option. Don`t want to be in anyone`s Facebook either, that`d be a huge turn off and red flag to me.

The interwebz (along with everybody else) can butt off my relationships, as far as I`m concerned. In the words of the lead vocalist for The Germs, "What we do is secret! Secret!"
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Last edited by feelyunicorn; 06-09-2012 at 03:04 AM.
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Old 06-09-2012, 02:50 AM
km34 km34 is offline
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Do most people on your FB know you're poly? I would assume so since you want to add her as a partner, but just checking....

Why not get rid of the relationship status altogether and list both of them as partners in the friends/family section? This would make them completely equal on the Facebook playing field.

I kind of wish I had chosen to keep my relationship status blank (it doesn't show up on your profile if you don't choose one of the preset options), but when I was 18, it was a big deal for me to list it as engaged, and then all my family was all excited when I got to change it to married and change my last name (which happened MONTHS before I actually dealt with the legal process lol). I've listed multiple partners on fetlife before, but sometimes I kind of wish I didn't have that preferential treatment on a website I use everyday (FB). Now, though, I couldn't change that without my entire extended family noticing and wondering and since I live thousands of miles away it would come down to my parents having to deal with it, and that's just not fair. If/when everyone knows that I have relationships with other people, I probably will change it since you can choose Partner in the other section.
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Old 06-09-2012, 03:05 AM
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Phy Phy is offline
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I don't use facebook much, but I listed Sward as married with and added Lin as partner after I told my family. I decided to hide all my friends and relationship status after the reaction of my mother and leave this information be. As I said, I don't use facebook that often therefore no one realized the change of Lin's status stated in the small sentence "Phy added Lin as partner." I deleted it the next day for the public eye, but I personally need things to be in order. Therefore I always see 'married with' and partner when I look at my profile. That's enough for me
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Old 06-09-2012, 10:01 PM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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I just don't put my relationship status on Facebook. Those that know don't need to see it on a social networking site, those that don't know don't need to know.
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Old 06-10-2012, 12:10 AM
feelyunicorn feelyunicorn is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CielDuMatin View Post
I just don't put my relationship status on Facebook. Those that know don't need to see it on a social networking site, those that don't know don't need to know.
Amen! God bless!
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Old 06-10-2012, 05:05 AM
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lovefromgirl lovefromgirl is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CielDuMatin View Post
I just don't put my relationship status on Facebook. Those that know don't need to see it on a social networking site, those that don't know don't need to know.
Serendipitously (and, if you know us, inevitably), we agree on this one. I don't even bother with "In an Open Relationship" anymore. That's TMI unless I feel like telling. There's a Darling whose name is never revealed, and my friends who do know who he is respect our desire for privacy. Just the way I like it!
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Old 06-14-2012, 08:22 PM
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Piroska Piroska is offline
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I have Guy listed as "in an open relationship with" on my facebook (the one that my fetish/modeling people see, anyway), but only since he started getting active on facebook and wanted people to know who he was in relation to me. When Juliette opened a facebook account (the other day) I listed her as "Partner-Female" in the Family and Friends section. It's not equal treatment on the facebook page (in a relationship with is much more prominent than partners are), and I was somewhat annoyed with that, but to answer the original question, yes, it works. (Now I have not tried adding multiple people as "partners", so I don't know how well that would work.)
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Old 06-15-2012, 12:17 PM
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YouAreHere YouAreHere is offline
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My partner has a relationship status of "in an open relationship" and has listed me and my metamour as "Partners" in the family section. He did create a page for the both of us, so he could have "In an open relationship with..." but I was neither here nor there about that.

My metamour has "in an open relationship" and has listed him as Partner.

I (Mono) have "in a relationship" and have listed him as Partner.

The creation of the page on FB for the two of us seemed to get some mutual friends' knickers in a twist ("OMG, he's being arrogant and bragging, and..." <sigh>), but he wanted to give us both billing rather than give nobody billing, and it seemed like a decent way of doing that.
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Old 06-19-2012, 04:32 PM
AutumnalTone AutumnalTone is offline
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I'm listed as being in an open relationship with Curly (my wife). I just got entangled with a new partner and she is listed as a Partner. I'd like to be able to put all of my partners together in a group at the head of the family listing; currently FB just adds them to the list in the fashion it chooses.
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