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Old 03-04-2010, 11:56 PM
CFstasha CFstasha is offline
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Default Just kind of fell into this…

I'm a happily married childfree woman, been with my husband for six and a half years, married three and a half. It's wonderful to see some mono partners poking around this site because my husband, while he's very supportive of the relationship I have budding, isn't interested in finding another lover, and he thinks that's a little weird.

I didn't try to find someone else, but sometimes it's not something you choose when you fall I guess. What I appreciate the most about this whole experience is the freedom to (a) not feel guilty about natural chemistry and (2) not question "what this means" for my marriage, that I could have feelings for another man. This is huge; so many marriages and relationships are built on the "if I love someone else I must not love the other person anymore" foundation, and it's a relief to not feel like my love for my husband is compromised, because it's so not.

We're still working out logistics and boundaries with Shiny New BF and his girlfriend (also poly), but things are new, feelings are strong and everything's exciting! We're learning as we go, but we're starting from a place of stability, love, support and open communication. I'm a little afraid of momentum in this time of boundaries still being determined, but it's a great adventure.

I'm thrilled to find this forum and see so many thoughtful people coming together to help those of us who are new to this with advice and guidance.
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  #2  
Old 03-05-2010, 12:03 AM
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CielDuMatin CielDuMatin is offline
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Welcome to the forum. Yes there are quite a few folks here in a poly/mono configuration, and it definitely can be made to work and work well. Most find that it is a bit more of a challenge, but workable.

I hope that you and he find what you need here.
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  #3  
Old 03-05-2010, 01:36 AM
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MonoVCPHG MonoVCPHG is offline
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Your husband is fine. He only stands out in non-monogamous circles
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Old 03-05-2010, 06:17 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Ours is one more to add to the mono-poly list. My husband is interested in casual sex, I'm interested in romantic relationships. My husband has enough trouble dealing with the emotions of one woman, let alone two, and god forbid more than that :P

Kudos to your husband for being supportive and dealing with this new turn in your marriage, especially when he doesn't share those feelings himself. Good catch!!
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Old 03-05-2010, 09:18 PM
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vandalin vandalin is offline
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Welcome! My husband is the same, not interested in anyone else while I am the one who fell. Enjoy the NRE no matter what may come.
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Old 03-06-2010, 04:37 AM
CFstasha CFstasha is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by SchrodingersCat View Post
Kudos to your husband for being supportive and dealing with this new turn in your marriage, especially when he doesn't share those feelings himself. Good catch!!
He *is* a great catch, thank you!! I am a lucky, lucky girl.
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