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Old 12-24-2011, 10:05 AM
mgreen1104 mgreen1104 is offline
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Default bar scene sucks?

Hey guys

So I went out for the first time the other night just to meet people, not for sex or anything, but just to meet friends. In a six hour period, I went to four bars. It may have been that it was a Thursday night, but they were all empty,which first was very strange, but the people who were there came with friends and closed their group off to outsiders. I had fun just talking to random people over the night but no one that I felt could turn into a friendship, let alone a relationship. If anyone can help me think of some ideas to maybe meet people other than a bar, where is more cliche than i figured lol.
Also, what is everyone's thoughts on meeting someone online? I actually emailed someone back on craigslist,they replied back very enthusiastic, than asked for my picture. I know im not the best looking guy in the world, and im not very photogenic. When i sent what i thought was the best picture i had, i didnt hear a word from her. Does that mean she was shallow from the get go or am I being paranoid? I dont want to judge people or assume things but thats just what i felt happened. I do really like this life style, and i know that its not something that happens over night for either my wife or I. I just want to understand. Thank you guys
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:48 AM
InfinitePossibility InfinitePossibility is offline
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Hey. I always find the best way to meet people is to do something that I'm interested in. I've found getting involved in groups, clubs, seminars and the like to be excellent ways to make new friends.

The other thing I find really useful is to spend time with friends who I know are good at the thing I want to get good at.

And lots of people are really helpful if you tell them that you think they are fabulous at something and that you'd like to learn some of their skill.

Good luck,

IP
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Old 12-24-2011, 10:49 AM
mgreen1104 mgreen1104 is offline
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thank you ip
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Old 12-24-2011, 04:30 PM
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nycindie nycindie is offline
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Lots of polyfolk use okcupid.com to meet people. You will see lots of references to "OKC" here. It's free and poly-friendly. I've met a few great friends and lovers there (and a few duds).
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Last edited by nycindie; 05-01-2014 at 04:08 AM.
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Old 12-24-2011, 08:42 PM
mgreen1104 mgreen1104 is offline
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ty so much cind im on there but its as my wife and I should i make a private account would you recommend?
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Old 12-25-2011, 07:30 AM
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SchrodingersCat SchrodingersCat is offline
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Most people go to clubs for one of two reasons: to dance, or to hook-up (engage in casual sexual acts), or both. Either way, not an ideal way to start long term relationships.

OKC has been good for meeting people, but I've never had a fulfilling relationship through it. Met my husband at a fetish event and the event's ongoing online forum, a discussion group not unlike this one but all centered around the kink scene of one small city.

Point is, do what you're going to do anyway and just get out a lot and talk to people. Things will line up when they're meant to...
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