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Old 10-25-2011, 09:36 PM
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MayFlower MayFlower is offline
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Default New, curious, confused.

So hello all. I'm an almost-20 female who is just recently have really started considering Polyamory in regards to my life and relationship. I am currently in a monogamous relationship with my boyfriend/lifemate...thing. I never know what to call us. It's been almost four years now and while it might not seem like a long time to some, and certainly it does feel like time flew but I feel like we have a very stable foundation.

The whole Poly discussion between us started with my reading a story that featured a Triad, which Crypt (his usual online nickname) had never really seen or heard of. Not thinking much of it the idea was set aside as something interesting but nothing more. Several months/ a year passes and I'm doing some introspection and realize I have feelings for one of my best friends, another girl. Although I had a 'bi-phase' in middle school I had decided after a while I was straight. Or possibly bi-romantic. Crypt thinks I might be actually bisexual. I don't really know.

But anyway I let that thought go about my friend because it felt like a passing thought, not a great desire and I didn't know how she or Crypt would feel about it, and I never really put much effort into the idea.

A few months pass and Crypt brings it up. I'm not actually too surprised because I know they were close and he cared a lot about her and sometimes the way he said things did sound like a crush. So we talked about Polyamory. My friend was in a relationship though so we decided to try and make some friends by way of the PolyMatchMaker site and see if that lead anywhere. That happened all of a week ago. The forums on that site are rather slow though even if the people are pretty nice so after lurking here for the past day or two I've decided to post and hang out in a more official way.


TL;DR : Hi, I'm young, new, need people to talk to about these things and this forum is faster than the other site I'm on. I like to bounce ideas off of people and like to ask for advice a lot but hopefully I won't be too much of a nusence(sp?).

Also I love to talk about myself so feel free to ask questions xD
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Old 10-25-2011, 11:33 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Hey May. Go slow, communicate a lot, and don't get too set on any particular way things have to go or a relationship structure that you might have in your head as ideal... just explore and see what life beings you. Oh, and read the stuff at www.morethantwo.com, it's awesome.
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Old 10-25-2011, 11:39 PM
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MayFlower MayFlower is offline
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Hehe, yeah that's pretty much the key to my current relationship too, communicate. I have been reading just about anything I can get my hands on relating to the subject as I usually do. I'm gonna be really excited just to make new friends. I love making friends xD

I do try not to make any plans too far ahead of time, I donno if its just the nature of life or my relationship with Crypt but every plan we make seems to change about 6 times before we get there, usually for even better results than the original plan.
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Old 10-25-2011, 11:50 PM
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AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MayFlower View Post
Hehe, yeah that's pretty much the key to my current relationship too, communicate. I have been reading just about anything I can get my hands on relating to the subject as I usually do. I'm gonna be really excited just to make new friends. I love making friends xD

I do try not to make any plans too far ahead of time, I donno if its just the nature of life or my relationship with Crypt but every plan we make seems to change about 6 times before we get there, usually for even better results than the original plan.
Perfect! If you've got comunication and flexibility down, you're well on your way to being poly pros.
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Old 10-26-2011, 05:25 AM
Shiar Shiar is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by MayFlower View Post
I'm gonna be really excited just to make new friends. I love making friends xD
Hello May! I just joined the forum looking for new friends as well! My long time bf and I just expanded our relationship recently to include our live in bf. We are all three fairly new to the poly relationship so it's been great reading the information on this forum, and everyone seems pretty supportive and friendly here. Welcome!
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Old 10-26-2011, 01:47 PM
47newbie 47newbie is offline
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Another thing to remember is that not all romances need to go physical to be "romantic." I'm certainly not discouraging the physical, and personally I see sex as a significant expression of ones feeling for another. However, the older I get the more I realize some of those around me love me without needing to sleep with me.

As with any relationship sex can change preceptions and expectations, so enjoy each step of the romance before proceeding to the next. Sometimes you can't "back step."
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Old 10-26-2011, 06:49 PM
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MayFlower MayFlower is offline
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Originally Posted by 47newbie View Post
Another thing to remember is that not all romances need to go physical to be "romantic." I'm certainly not discouraging the physical, and personally I see sex as a significant expression of ones feeling for another. However, the older I get the more I realize some of those around me love me without needing to sleep with me.

As with any relationship sex can change preceptions and expectations, so enjoy each step of the romance before proceeding to the next. Sometimes you can't "back step."
I totally agree o.o I have absolutely no problem waiting for a few years even before things get that far. And sense I might only be Bi romantic anyway that could be just a perminate thing.
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Old 09-27-2013, 01:18 PM
Brittnij15 Brittnij15 is offline
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Smile Heyyy

Hey! You sound perfect! You interested in talking a little more? I'm 22 and I'm looking for a girl to hangout with a d all that fun stuff. I've been with my boyfriend for about. Year and were looking for Oenone to one chill with us.
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