3-person living arrangements.

Nakedone

New member
This is my first visit to this site. But it is not my first time to experience what is discussed her. I have had a number of experiences which could be called "polyamory", even though they were very different.

I am very aware that there are many different "kinds" of polyamory, and that nearly everyone will have a different definition, so I will give mine and attempt to help others organize their thinking on this very "outrageous" topic.

One thing that seems to be basic to all defiinitions is that there are at least three people involved in a sexual relationship of some kind. But, beyond that, the varieties are many!

From my own experience, the most "usual" polyamory relationship involves two men and one woman. And, in most cases, one of the men will be the husband of the one woman involved. But, not always.

I, personally, have been involved in MFM sexual situations in which the woman was my wife; in others where the woman was the other man's wife; and in still others where neither was married to the one woman. Of all those relationships, my estimate is that sixty percent of them were those involving my wife and me and one other man. Another thirty would have involved a woman, another man, and me, and neither of us was married to her. Only the other ten percent would have involved me with a married couple.

I would like to discuss the many different kinds of polyamory, either through private messages, or on this open forum. I do want to read the experiences from others and am willing to share my own. Perhaps we can learn from each other in this way.

My question to any who read this is: "How do YOU define Polyamory, and what kinds of three-person sexual relationships have you enjoyed most?"
 
My views on polyamory

First of all, I am not sure that most who post on this site are open to the opinions of those who disagree with them, but I will give it a try.

My definition of Polyamory is when three or more persons are involved in a "love triangle", and when all are aware, and also agreeable to the relationship(s).

And when I say "Love" I am also saying SEX! I do believe that this element must be present to call it a Polyamorous relationship.

I am speaking from experience. I have, in the past, been involved in three different relationships in which I "shared" a woman with another man. In two of these cases, she met with each of us separately, but in the third, we were all three present for our "sessions".

I will probably not discuss any more details of these experiences on this public post, but any who want to discuss it through personal messages to me are invited to do so.

Please understand that I am not open to those who would want to "straighten me out", and will not reply to such messages.
 
I have not seen this term, "Trois Menage" used in any of these threads so far. In history, and classic literature, it is a living arrangement of three persons, nearly always a husband and wife and another man.

In the most traditional sense, the husband was considerably older than his wife, and could not perform sexually to satisfy her needs. So, a younger man was brought into the household, usually under the guise of being a gardner or some other servant, but his real role was to provide sexual services for the wife.

It was one of those arrangements that everyone understood, but no one criticized, since it was seen as being "necessary".

We still have such arrangements today, though they are rarely labeled as such, nor are they as obvious. I personally knew a young man who was hired by a small company, with one of his duties being to go to the company president's house twice a week to "perform" such duties as the boss's wife would need.

It was a blatant example of an older man providing a younger lover for his wife, and even paying the other man.

This is, in my extimation, an example of Polyamory!
 
Once, for a period of several weeks, while I was in a transitional time of my life, I shared living space with two other persons, a single woman and a single man. We each had our own bedrooms, but share the other spaces.

The woman and the other man had been sexually involved before I came on the scene, so I was surprised when the other man asked if I would like to be included. The first time, the woman came to my room and we had sex together, then she went to the other man's room and they did the same.

Later, the other man wanted to talk with me about the experience, and get my reactions to what had happened. I was surprised to learn that I could discuss it so easily with this "other man".

During the few weeks that we were all together, she usually came to my room first, then to his, but a few times she reversed her pattern. And, one time only, we were all three in the room while she had sex with us both in turn.

Have any others had similar experiences?
 
We have something similar to this now, but then we are in a loving vee relationship that includes every aspect of life. Not just sex...

What is it that you are looking for here? I am left feeling confused about your posts and threads as I don't understand what you are getting at... are you looking for others who have experienced sharing sex with the same woman for the purpose of sex sake? I doubt you will find that here? Why do you want to talk about this so much? Are you hurt because you were in love with the woman and it wasn't okay because they were just open and not poly?

I don't feel I can discuss anything with you with out your opening up and explaining your feelings... making your self more vulnerable and sharing more of the emotions behind the situation you were in rather than the horniness that occurred... there are other sites for that.

Have you done some reading here yet on what peoples experiences are? Have you looked at other sites that talk purely about sex and the dynamics that can occur? I would be willing to help you find a site that IS willing to talk about the sexual aspect of threesomes in open relationships if you need that as this isn't the place unless you want to talk about the other aspects and are willing to share more of the emotional aspect of situations.
 
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