Me: Girl going through an amicable divorce. Currently conducting relationships with two boyfriends. Loves both guys bunches, is going out of her head at the idea that the second relationship might not be working out because the guy in question feels like he is naturally monogamous.
Boy A: A year-long relationship. He thinks he can get behind the idea of poly but doesn't have any other girlfriends yet. We met at school, and became friends first, lovers later, over the course of many months while my marriage was dissolving. He's supportive as hell, but sometimes I am frustrated by his lack of personal resolve and how he can be really wishy-washy and easily influenced.
Boy B: A three-months-long relationship. He thinks he can only be monogamous, and has made it clear that he would totally be willing to jump ship if he met a girl who was willing to give him the same commitment. We met off of the internet, and I just adored him from the outset and never want to leave his side when I am with him. I think about him constantly. Like, really, constantly. I fell for him so hard that I think it's making me stupid
So, last night I was really stressing and Boy B and I had a long talk about how (his words) "it is not a probability but an inevitability" that this is going to end... at some point. But I am really not wanting that point to be now, even though I understand that it would probably suck more if it ends later than if it ends now. I just don't feel like I've gotten enough yet -- he's an amazing person, and I feel lucky every day to have met him. I am not ready to give up even though I am scared of getting hurt. Seems it's going to come now or later, why not put it off until the last possible moment to get all the good stuff in between?
I respect the opinions of the people on this board, so, what do you think? Should I just give up, or should I keep trying to convince him that we should take all the time together we can get?
Boy A: A year-long relationship. He thinks he can get behind the idea of poly but doesn't have any other girlfriends yet. We met at school, and became friends first, lovers later, over the course of many months while my marriage was dissolving. He's supportive as hell, but sometimes I am frustrated by his lack of personal resolve and how he can be really wishy-washy and easily influenced.
Boy B: A three-months-long relationship. He thinks he can only be monogamous, and has made it clear that he would totally be willing to jump ship if he met a girl who was willing to give him the same commitment. We met off of the internet, and I just adored him from the outset and never want to leave his side when I am with him. I think about him constantly. Like, really, constantly. I fell for him so hard that I think it's making me stupid
So, last night I was really stressing and Boy B and I had a long talk about how (his words) "it is not a probability but an inevitability" that this is going to end... at some point. But I am really not wanting that point to be now, even though I understand that it would probably suck more if it ends later than if it ends now. I just don't feel like I've gotten enough yet -- he's an amazing person, and I feel lucky every day to have met him. I am not ready to give up even though I am scared of getting hurt. Seems it's going to come now or later, why not put it off until the last possible moment to get all the good stuff in between?
I respect the opinions of the people on this board, so, what do you think? Should I just give up, or should I keep trying to convince him that we should take all the time together we can get?