Getting into a relationship with a married person

Wow. The amount of love and respect in this thread between all of you is amazing and wonderful. It is the type of thing I can only hope will be in my life one day. Rolypoly I think you have entered into something lovely and special and I hope all the best for you and the course of your relationship. I love reading the threads on here because they usually asuage my own fears and enforce the positives of poly for me. Threads like these are things that make me smile and feel warm :)
 
OK....with all the new things going on and everyone having someone in thier life I am officially anouncing my poly relationship for the first time on here. I have been holding back because I have sworn up and down that a person can be wired mono....well I have a confession. There is two other loves in my life...one smells like leather and rubber and the other is the hairiest pussy I have ever kissed....I am in love with my motorbike and Redpepper's cat...there you have it folks....I'm a fraud :rolleyes:

Imagine that :)

Now...........some people knew that all the time - but kept your secret for you.

:)
 
I've been thinking about how to word this so bear with me...Roly, I think I understand some of what your concerns are here. My thought is that part of what makes Nerdist who he is is his relationship with others in his life and with his family. It's not something that can be separated out. If part of what you see as attractive is the entire dynamic of his family that's ok...that's part of him. It's like we're told when we're young to see how a man treats his mother to get an idea of how he will treat you. Isn't it even better to see how he treats his wife and child?

I might be a little biased here but how could anyone not be attracted to how the dynamic between Mono, Nerdist and Redpepper is. There is so much love and respect there that it just seems to spill over into everyone they touch. I always feel honoured to be around them.

-Derby
 
...little speechless at this one :)

Yes, speechless. I feel like I need to say something, but really, I am just happy. I want to feed the love between everyone as much as I feel like I've been fed, if that makes any sense.

Derby, no kidding! And thank you, that assuaged my fears. It's a lot to come to terms with.
 
Roly, have you read the thread I started on relationships? It was about being a good host and guest in peoples lives. One of our many analagies.
 
I'm goof 100% of the time..but it's not a competition..unless you want it to be ;)
I can out goof the best of them..bring it Derby!

Who are you kidding Mono, everything's a race to you, no? Hmm... who can show compersion to RP & Nerdist the quickest? tee hee
 
Roly, have you read the thread I started on relationships? It was about being a good host and guest in peoples lives. One of our many analagies.

Yes, I've read that thread and I love that concept. I've used it consciously a few times since reading it.
 
Totally off topic...but you know how people say that they're spiritual or intelectual, why is it that no one ever says that they are a being rooted in the physical? I think that I am. I feel most connected to things when I am moving in some way or experiencing things with my senses. It's not to say that I don't have a good head on my shoulders or that I don't appreciate the value of meditation. But my feeling of connection to the rest of the world is more physical than anything. (It might go to explain my total lack of any kind of artistic talent).

Back to your thread Roly...

-Derby
 
I feel most connected to things when I am moving in some way or experiencing things with my senses.

Back to your thread Roly...

-Derby

I'm spiritually rooted to the person I love...I'm physically rooted to the world. When I kiss Redpepper it is more spiritual and "Utopian"...when I ride motorbike it is more physical and grounded in the earth. Both are intense connections but my earth connection is primitive and aggressive and my spiritual connection is enlightened and beyond animal instinct.

I'm a mix and seem to move in and out of phase with each depending on how I feel and who I am with.

When I am at work my earth grounding is at the forefront because that is the environment. When I am with Redpepper and family I am spiritually grounded because it is safe to be vulnerable in that way. Spiritually grounded people get eaten alive in my work place LOL!
 
Oh Derby, thank you for bringing this up! It's exactly relevant.

I wonder if it's a given, in our society, that we're expected to be grounded in the physical, so we don't often make a point of saying it. My friend (who has the same name as you actually) that I've known for nearly 20 years is much like you. Practical, grounded in the physical. She feels good in her body. She also feels out of touch with artistic things and has had trouble understanding us artsy types. She never understood why my emotions run so deep. Just the way we're wired.

Personally, I find it difficult to stay grounded in the physical. Partly because I'm so up in my head, because I'm so sensitive and partly because I have physical pain and challenges in my body, so it's often uncomfortable to be rooted in my body.

Mono, I just love how you describe the spiritual connection you have with RP. I also feel an intense and powerful spiritual connection with Nerdist. Phew.
 
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