Unitarian Universalists for Polyamory Awareness (UUPA)

Upstate New York Chapter

Now that we've got some enthusiasm for UU and UUPA in New York, when can we get an upstate New York chapter started? Every little bit of visibility improves, sooner or later, the acceptance of polyamorous people and families in more UU congregations. You can contribute directly to UUPA's mission of providing support, promoting education, and encouraging spiritual wholeness regarding polyamory.

For info about starting a UUPA chapter, visit uupa.org
Then email me for more information. My contact info is on the site.

Jasmine
 
Standing on the Side of Love

So Valentine's Day is coming up. Many UU churches will be focusing in some way on "Standing on the Side of Love." I can't wait for ours here.

The campaign goal is this: "Standing on the Side of Love is a public advocacy campaign that seeks to harness love’s power to stop oppression," as stated on their About page.

And the why:

"
This is a time of great hope and possibility, yet our communities are threatened by the increased prevalence of acts motivated by fear and hate.


No one should be dehumanized through acts of exclusion, oppression, or violence because of their identities.

In public debates over immigration, LGBT rights, and more, religious people stand on the side of love and call for respect, inclusion, and compassion."

And the how:

"The Standing on the Side of Love campaign elevates compassionate religious voices to influence public attitudes and public policy.

Through community activism, social networking, and media outreach, people across the nation are equipped to counter fear and make love real in the world."


I definitely see the connection of this philosophy with and the usefulness it could have for the polyamorous community.



~Raven~
 
Hmmmmmm

Wouldn't it be interesting if they or someone wouldn't just come out and "Stand on the Side of Love" for love's sake - with no agenda attached.
Oppression and all the other valuable social causes would be unnecessary.
Interesting..........

Yep. Wouldn't that be nice?

Unfortunately that's not the case, yet people still seem to think that there's a problem with having an "agenda" of inclusion and dismantling of such oppressions that exist. Reality is what it is.

Wouldn't it be interesting if someone could speak out for such "agendas" of equality and inclusion without others belittling such causes as un-evolved?
 
Yep. Wouldn't that be nice?

Unfortunately that's not the case, yet people still seem to think that there's a problem with having an "agenda" of inclusion and dismantling of such oppressions that exist. Reality is what it is.

Wouldn't it be interesting if someone could speak out for such "agendas" of equality and inclusion without others belittling such causes as un-evolved?

Yea Ceoli- looking back, that statement might have come off wrong.
I still have this habit of just letting thoughts flow off my tongue without a lot of forethought about how those with different sensibilities might read them.
I sincerely do cry out for a world where people's sexual preference, gender, race, social status etc were all non-issues as we all navigate life together. And as you say - that ISN"T now :(
But I've lived in such a world, albeit for a short time (and no-not just in my mind lol) and I guess I still harbor that fantasy that EVERYONE is capable of seeing the benefits and moving in that direction.
But that seems a fantasy too.

GS
 
Thanks for that GS.

It can get a bit exhausting in a climate where choosing to speak out for such things is regarded as tiresome and annoying by others. I've experienced that sentiment on this forum.
 
Thanks for that GS.

It can get a bit exhausting in a climate where choosing to speak out for such things is regarded as tiresome and annoying by others. I've experienced that sentiment on this forum.

Yes Ceoli,

Not to sidetrack the thread, but that is always a tricky balance.
I think any of us who have developed a passion for a particular cause have experienced that.
It's one of those skills you try to master in successful activism. There's an early phase when general public awareness doesn't exist and you have to make a lot of 'noise' to get the word out. But once past that phase - and detecting that point really is tricky - then you pass into a phase where a soft, casual reference is more than sufficient as a reminder. At that stage, more than that does/can become tiring or annoying as you said. It's like the big war drums continuing to beat long after the battle has begun. It can become more distracting than beneficial. The drums are intended to strike fear into the heart of the enemy. Once the battle has begun, you need to hear who's sneaking up behind you. :)

Carry on......

GS
 
But once past that phase - and detecting that point really is tricky - then you pass into a phase where a soft, casual reference is more than sufficient as a reminder. At that stage, more than that does/can become tiring or annoying as you said. It's like the big war drums continuing to beat long after the battle has begun. It can become more distracting than beneficial. The drums are intended to strike fear into the heart of the enemy. Once the battle has begun, you need to hear who's sneaking up behind you. :)

I disagree. What needs to be done and how it needs to be done is not always dictated by those who are not aware of the issues or those who may be in positions of privilege where knowledge of such issues only constitutes an annoyance, especially since there is a whole group of people who are more profoundly affected by such issues and *have* to deal with it whether others feel ready to or not.

Just my two cents there.
 
Taking a stand

Some UU ministers have taken stands not to sign marriage licenses until every member of their individual congregations who is partnered can enjoy the same privileges of marriage as heterosexual couples.

I have found that a few of the UU churches I know of, including the one I went to last Sunday, spoke of the particular situation those in LGBTQ relationships face including issues of filing federal taxes. Even if their marriage is recognized on a state level, federally it is not. I spoke with a lesbian couple yesterday who described the rigmarole filing taxes turns into, including filling out a "dummy" federal form so they can give those figures on the state level even while they file another form altogether federally.

While I don't care for marriage as it currently stands as a monogamous government sanctioned institution in the U.S., I do feel heartened and inspired by the stands UU ministers and ministers of other faiths take towards encouraging equality and being the change when it comes to love.

~Raven~
 
I'm glad I found this thread! I'm UU, and leaving my church in MA was the one thing that made me really sad about moving back to WA recently, even though I was never officially a member. I didn't know there was any sort of poly presence, though it doesn't surprise me that there would be! I've been meaning to check out the local congregation but just haven't got around to it. I'm going to make it a point to go this weekend.

My wife, C, and I were honored to have our (not strictly monogamous) marriage blessed first by a retired gay Episcopal minister in an unsanctioned ceremony, and then legally bound three years later by my wonderful UU minister.

(Off topic, kinda)

Oh, and as a legally same-sex married person, don't even get me started on the tax thing. :rolleyes: It gives me a headache just thinking about it. I'm just glad that, for better or for worse, WA doesn't have income tax. Dealing with the Feds and MA is pain enough.

And just to make your head spin, while the required legal words to get married don't actually invoke monogamy (although most religious ceremonies do and we made sure to remove the "forsaking all others" line from ours), I did have to swear that my relationship with C was monogamous in order to add her to my health insurance at work as a domestic partner! :eek:
 
Yay! Welcome to the forums katharinerose!

Not off topic at all I think. And yeah, I could feel the pain of what it must be like to file those taxes during the conversation I had.

Having to swear you were monogamous for health insurance... :( That is really creepy. I hope universal healthcare doesn't become a complete shambles (now that really is a off topic lol).

I'd be looking forward to hear about your experience this weekend if you do go to your new UU!

We moved recently and started attending a UU church. There is commingling between a few congregations in this region. I've met some great people and I feel quite at home. It would be great to have a UUPA chapter here as well.

I may add more later. Late lunch is over :D

~Raven~
 
I'm glad I noticed this thread. I've been meaning to check out UU for almost 10 years but never got around to it :)p). I was just talking with Maenad and some of our friends about heading to our local UU meeting this Sunday to check it out. Now I'm definately going.
 
We're visiting a different UU church this Sunday too. That'll be fun to come back and see what everyone's experience was like :D

~Raven~
 
How was everyone's UU experience this weekend?

Mine was interesting. People were very, very, very friendly. Like, almost scary friendly. And there were name tags. Coming from a very reserved New England congregation, it was a nice surprise. I spent two years at my church in MA, even was a soloist with the choir, and never really got to know people that well. Not that people weren't nice and polite, but I never really felt like one of them. The people here are like your college roommates parents who meet you and invite you to their house for Christmas and then hug you goodbye within the space of an hour.

On the other hand, the service wasn't anywhere near as beautiful and inspiring as my old church. I always left feeling invigorated and that I had learned something new. The minister was at the district conference and the lay leaders, well, they seem like nice old guys but never seemed to have a point. And it was a much more casual service than I'm used to, which is fine, but I enjoy my ritual. They are currently searching for a new minister, so we'll see how that goes.

I'm going to keep attending, as the community seems wonderful. But I may need to bug my old ministers about putting the sermons out as podcasts.
 
My newest UU experience

Hi katharinerose and everyone!

We visited another UU church a few weeks ago. The church itself is much brighter. More windows and more sunlight. The people are still very friendly. My love felt a few were "close-talkers" a la Seinfeld. This would be true.

Oddly, as in katharinerose's case, the minister was also not there and the service was run by the church leaders. I felt the service was very moving still as it centered on volunteerism and the experiences of the members who volunteered in different ways was shared.

My first impression is that this UU church is more service-oriented. More active. More activist. In addition to this, there was more of a Christian flavor here than in the other UU church we had visited. Both congregations are full of children but this one also seemed to have many teenagers and more younger adults than the other.

Coffee hour afterwards was still fun and full of discussion and mingling. I carried out tons of literature as I'm wont to do.

Currently I prefer the previous UU church but I think this has a great deal to do with the overwhelmingly welcome atmosphere I felt when I went to the first. It was as though the sermons and guest speakers were speaking to my experience personally even while the majority of the congregation may not have been from the same background as me. I also like the regular references to and insights taken from various religions.

I think it was matter of being in the right place at the right time unusually.

Depending on which sermon and events move us, we'll go back and forth between the two.

My birthday is coming up and we'll be going to the city (NYC). I'm hoping to visit one of the UU churches there as well and see what it's like. And perhaps meet up with a few poly people :D.

~Raven~
 
On the other hand, the service wasn't anywhere near as beautiful and inspiring as my old church.

Might you consider serving on the worship committee? Then you can participate in planning the services, and suggest ideas that will add in the beauty and inspiration that you miss.

Jasmine
 
The fact that this exists is one of the reasons why I love the UU. You would never see this in the faith I was raised in.

Boo, Martin Luther.
 
Exploring UU

I'm currently just starting to explore Unitarianism. I've always found the concept interesting and invigorating, not being able to fully accept the 'Christian' version of the truth, or any other version that says 'My God is right, and yours is wrong...'. I'm planning to attend the Canadian Unitarian Council in Victoria in May, with friends from the poly community. Good to hear some of the positive feedback!
 
How wonderful! I've been UU for awhile and had no idea they were so supportive of the poly lifestyle. Not that I'm surprised....YAY UU!!!
 
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