TeamD79
New member
Our kids story
My husband and I became involved in a triangle relationship with our unicorn well established in our marriage and lives. Our oldest is 15 and had the hardest time with the introduction of our girlfriend, however the younger children (8 and 11) didn't seem to bat an eyelash as she was introduced to the kids early on and made to feel part of the family.
We involved the kids in the relationship change seeing as it could change their lives as well as our own. For example we went out to eat and watched movies and played games with them just as if she was part of the family. We have had very close family friends before that were not involved in our relationship, and the younger children simply saw this as the same.
Our oldest being of dating age and doing a bit of soul searching herself saw the truth easily without us ever having to discuss the sexual nature of the relationship, which in our opinion is not their concern because we have raised them to be very open and understanding.
After talking with our daughter however and explaining that our friend made us happy and that it was about more than just sex, she understood and just as the others grew very close to our girlfriend, and that was all it took.
When mom and dad are happy the children usually follow suit if you keep an open relationship with them, not to mention that it is a good example to show the kids to love and grow and to not be ashamed of who you are and who you love.
However, we did have that small fear in the back of our minds that something could happen, someone outside who didn't understand could cause some kind of scene. We were careful to not be obvious in public, we kept the serious part to ourselves. But luckily nothing like that ever happened & even though the relationship is over she still does activities with us, just as several other of our friends do, the only one who knows something has changed is our oldest, who does understand the loss & knows mommy & daddy are hurt.
Our hope is that it will be taken as a lesson in life, one we learned with her as a family.
My husband and I became involved in a triangle relationship with our unicorn well established in our marriage and lives. Our oldest is 15 and had the hardest time with the introduction of our girlfriend, however the younger children (8 and 11) didn't seem to bat an eyelash as she was introduced to the kids early on and made to feel part of the family.
We involved the kids in the relationship change seeing as it could change their lives as well as our own. For example we went out to eat and watched movies and played games with them just as if she was part of the family. We have had very close family friends before that were not involved in our relationship, and the younger children simply saw this as the same.
Our oldest being of dating age and doing a bit of soul searching herself saw the truth easily without us ever having to discuss the sexual nature of the relationship, which in our opinion is not their concern because we have raised them to be very open and understanding.
After talking with our daughter however and explaining that our friend made us happy and that it was about more than just sex, she understood and just as the others grew very close to our girlfriend, and that was all it took.
When mom and dad are happy the children usually follow suit if you keep an open relationship with them, not to mention that it is a good example to show the kids to love and grow and to not be ashamed of who you are and who you love.
However, we did have that small fear in the back of our minds that something could happen, someone outside who didn't understand could cause some kind of scene. We were careful to not be obvious in public, we kept the serious part to ourselves. But luckily nothing like that ever happened & even though the relationship is over she still does activities with us, just as several other of our friends do, the only one who knows something has changed is our oldest, who does understand the loss & knows mommy & daddy are hurt.
Our hope is that it will be taken as a lesson in life, one we learned with her as a family.