Thread: confused
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Old 11-01-2010, 09:42 AM
Seekinganswer Seekinganswer is offline
Join Date: Oct 2010
Posts: 24
Default Moving forward..

Thanks redpepper,
Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
That being said, you are here now and it sounds like the three of you are starting a journey together now. I kind of worries me that it sounds like Ssebo holds all the good cards out of this though
Yes, your thoughts resonate with what I have told him before. Our journey is such that S is far off in the lead closely followed by D who surprisingly opened up to the poly proposal and I way in the back. We have all agreed to take things slow else I or D could get the feeling of walking on a speeding treading mill. The image of one trying to keep up with the speed but failing and reaching out for the something to hold on to comes to mind.

Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
All I can say is that Ssebo's wife, Seekinganswer, must be some woman to be willing to be so open and accepting so early on! I would be up one side of you and Ssebo in two seconds just by virtue of the fact that he seemed so selfish and you seemingly so passive to allow him to convince you that cheating was the answer.
I am working on being open and not there yet. It depends on whether its a good day or a bad day since d day and this is very unsettling for me to have such jumbled emotions. On the bad days, the strong flight feeling is in control telling me I'd be better off alone than hanging between this strong connection between the two. On such days, I dont or refuse to see where I fit. Unfortunately, this past weekend we spent together ended with me feeling pain again.

Originally Posted by redpepper View Post
When I think of the pain of knowing my deeply cherished trust, respect and loved partner had been lying for so long I can't imagine how anyone would ever be entirely the same after that. A lot of people aren't.
You are right.... one can never be the same again. In a blink of an eye, everything I knew was REAL changed and the past weeks for me where one big flashback of images. Someone compared this to an accident scene where the betrayed spouse remains rooted amidst the mangled metal and crash debris trying to piece everything together. Im certain there are situations where the betrayer tells the spouse to get over it already. I feel S is right next to me and has offered me his hand.

Last edited by Seekinganswer; 11-01-2010 at 10:35 AM.
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