nycindie
Active member
I also have preferences but I don't make them rules. I will go out with short, tall, thin, or overweight, short hair, long hair, or no hair. I don't like kissing smokers, but I have dated them, too. I am certainly drawn more to specific types but won't rule out other types completely -- because it's the person that's more important to me.
TL, that fact remains that you are always complaining about how hard it is for you to meet any women, and how much easier it is for women to meet men, as if it was a general statement of fact. But even if you will consider someone who is outside of your very narrow ideal, putting those specifications in your profile severely limits who will contact you -- so therefore, you should amend your statements about how hard it is for you to include the fact that you are super picky.
In my OKC profile, I say "I am attracted to a variety of physical types" and my age range is 36 to 62. That is ALL I say about physical attributes I am seeking. Everything else I specify that I am looking for is about personality traits. I see who contacts me, see who comes up in a search and let the person's profile or message to me influence whether or not I might be interested. If they write intelligently, show a good sense of humor, and don't seem to be solely focused on sex or finding The One, AND there is something about their looks that attracts me, even if not within my normal preferences, they have a chance. I was just looking at a profile today of a quite overweight bald guy - but he has beautiful eyes and a friendly smile, plus his profile is a fun read.
If there was a woman as picky as you are and put that in her profile, she would have as much of a hard time getting any responses as you do. But don't think that just because women might seem to you to get more responses that all those responses are good ones. We still have to weed out, believe me, but if we're not somewhat loose about what we're looking for in the first place, then... well, not many responses come our way! And ultimately it is just as difficult to find someone suitable. It does get tedious, but I would rather have more duds to choose from than to limit who will respond to my profile in the first place.
No one's saying you should relax your criteria, although you might be happier if you try. Just stop complaining about it as if your specifications have nothing to do with it.
TL, that fact remains that you are always complaining about how hard it is for you to meet any women, and how much easier it is for women to meet men, as if it was a general statement of fact. But even if you will consider someone who is outside of your very narrow ideal, putting those specifications in your profile severely limits who will contact you -- so therefore, you should amend your statements about how hard it is for you to include the fact that you are super picky.
In my OKC profile, I say "I am attracted to a variety of physical types" and my age range is 36 to 62. That is ALL I say about physical attributes I am seeking. Everything else I specify that I am looking for is about personality traits. I see who contacts me, see who comes up in a search and let the person's profile or message to me influence whether or not I might be interested. If they write intelligently, show a good sense of humor, and don't seem to be solely focused on sex or finding The One, AND there is something about their looks that attracts me, even if not within my normal preferences, they have a chance. I was just looking at a profile today of a quite overweight bald guy - but he has beautiful eyes and a friendly smile, plus his profile is a fun read.
If there was a woman as picky as you are and put that in her profile, she would have as much of a hard time getting any responses as you do. But don't think that just because women might seem to you to get more responses that all those responses are good ones. We still have to weed out, believe me, but if we're not somewhat loose about what we're looking for in the first place, then... well, not many responses come our way! And ultimately it is just as difficult to find someone suitable. It does get tedious, but I would rather have more duds to choose from than to limit who will respond to my profile in the first place.
No one's saying you should relax your criteria, although you might be happier if you try. Just stop complaining about it as if your specifications have nothing to do with it.
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