joyfulgirl26
New member
does anyone here have experience with therapy (psychological/talk) in the context of poly?
i am in indiana and had a really hard time finding a therapist who was even LGBT friendly, and i've been to her twice now and gotten some signals from her that although she has no PROBLEM with poly or kink (i am both), she doesn't really "get" either of them or understand how important and integral they are to my happiness.
my husband and i are currently trying to determine whether we can/should stay together and our first session with this therapist was a little frustrating for me in that she aligned herself with him during the discussions.
most notably: i tried to explain to her and my husband how compersion works for me (and i was NOT insinuating my husband should feel this way, just relating my own experience)...how i need a little less time and energy from my husband when i see him happy with someone else because THAT becomes part of the reward feedback i am getting from him at that point. but i ended up trailing off completely because it was clear from their facial expressions that neither she nor my husband had ANY idea what i was talking about, and neither of them prompted me to finish, which made me feel like they weren't interested in understanding it either.
so i guess my question is two-fold (or maybe three-fold): if you have experience with therapy in the context of poly, has it been positive, negative, helpful? was the therapist poly-friendly at all and if not, how was that handled?
i may have the heart and energy to go into more detail about the situation in the future, but i wanted to start with this for now and get some thoughts on therapy in general. thanks in advance from a very exhausted and frustrated wife.
i am in indiana and had a really hard time finding a therapist who was even LGBT friendly, and i've been to her twice now and gotten some signals from her that although she has no PROBLEM with poly or kink (i am both), she doesn't really "get" either of them or understand how important and integral they are to my happiness.
my husband and i are currently trying to determine whether we can/should stay together and our first session with this therapist was a little frustrating for me in that she aligned herself with him during the discussions.
most notably: i tried to explain to her and my husband how compersion works for me (and i was NOT insinuating my husband should feel this way, just relating my own experience)...how i need a little less time and energy from my husband when i see him happy with someone else because THAT becomes part of the reward feedback i am getting from him at that point. but i ended up trailing off completely because it was clear from their facial expressions that neither she nor my husband had ANY idea what i was talking about, and neither of them prompted me to finish, which made me feel like they weren't interested in understanding it either.
so i guess my question is two-fold (or maybe three-fold): if you have experience with therapy in the context of poly, has it been positive, negative, helpful? was the therapist poly-friendly at all and if not, how was that handled?
i may have the heart and energy to go into more detail about the situation in the future, but i wanted to start with this for now and get some thoughts on therapy in general. thanks in advance from a very exhausted and frustrated wife.
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