BF won't let me go!

The OP mentioned earlier that she has a medical condition which needs "looking after" and she doesn't have many friends where she is, nor does she trust many people to help with the medications. She knows she can count on him in this regard, so she feels he is her best option.

However, I would say, maybe now is the time to take a chance and risk stepping out of a narrow world to befriend others and make more connections that will be nurturing. Because the pros of this relationship do not really outweigh the cons.
 
The moving in is needed financially, i have been looking for a suitable housemate or another place without luck, the medical condition i have i need help and he is brilliant at it, i know it is not ideal but it is just for the final year of my degree.

I am totally not co-dependant, i am very independant, i moved out at 16 and never ask for help, that is a huge issue is that i try do things alone..i was willing to keep my place alone and take on a full time job with my last yr of uni to do it!

His contract is up thursday so i would feel an utter **** not letting him, he is having his own room so we have our own space,

i was a fab friend with him before we started dating..we are both chilled out people...im just going to hope we manage to work it out...he is a very busy person with hobbies as am i now so i think it is workable.

i never expected to fall in love with this man and am trying to do the best for all..please dont write me off as a silly little girl! x
 
Just noticed the replies...i have tried many times the past month to stay away from him, leave him to let things cool off and he rings me, turns up at my place...i am reluctant to let him go but he keeps fighting for me.

And since my last relationship and getting back into my hobbies i am starting to make new friends here, i hosted my first party this weekend and was amazing..so i am making new friends just none close enough i would trust to help me with my condition, plus you dont ask someone you have known a few months/weeks to deal with something that big! xxx
 
Just noticed the replies...i have tried many times the past month to stay away from him, leave him to let things cool off and he rings me, turns up at my place...i am reluctant to let him go but he keeps fighting for me.

And since my last relationship and getting back into my hobbies i am starting to make new friends here, i hosted my first party this weekend and was amazing..so i am making new friends just none close enough i would trust to help me with my condition, plus you dont ask someone you have known a few months/weeks to deal with something that big! xxx

Good for you on getting back out there and expanding your horizons.

I understand about the medical condition (my dad is blind, and I was the only caregiver he trusted for a long time). Just make sure you are doing what is best for you...only you know within your heart if its the right thing.

I would say putting space between you would help you sort out your feelings, but that's shot to shit if you live with the guy.

I would say this... IF you move in with him (sounds like your decision is already made), really focus on you. Continue to indulge in things that make you happy and being around other people. Also seek out alternate resources for your condition (I had to do this when I had to break from my father).

See if there are some government assistance or free caregiver resources (you'd be surprised at what's out there). Is there a nursing student that needs patient contact hours that could help you (they can't charge for that and they need the hours)? Check around. I just think the more that you make it clear that you don't need him as much (once you find other resources), he may back off a little.

Also, SET YOUR BOUNDARIES (preaching to myself here). Be clear about what you will and will not tolerate and CLEARLY define what a ROOMATE is and find common ground between the two of you.

As for the other girl... wouldn't worry about it if all he is gonna be is a ROOMATE. It's hard when friends become lovers and even harder when the friend becomes an ex-lover turned roomate. I commend you for even attempting it. I couldn't do it.

Best of luck to you... and I wasn't trying to be a B**** earlier. I just have a natural instinct to push someone out of the way if they're standing in the middle of the street and there's a Mack truck heading straight for them.

It's all about love... SELF love.... you're worth it honey!!! Smooches!!!
 
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