View Single Post
Old 12-01-2011, 05:33 PM
AnnabelMore's Avatar
AnnabelMore AnnabelMore is offline
Senior Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Posts: 2,285

Poly and mono are both ways of having loving relationships. For some people, the structure really is the problem because they're just not cut out to do it any other way, and that can cut in both directions. But even then, the problem is not the structure itself, the problem is the pitfalls of trying to get someone to accept something that just fundamentally clashes with how they find their happiness. Like if I absolutely cannot deal with my partner seeing anyone else and she absolutely cannot deal with only seeing me so we split up, is monogamy to blame? Is polyamory? No, we were just incompatible in that respect.

People lie and manipulate and make mistakes within both structures and, again, it's not the structures that are to blame. Poly can spur some people to become more honest and more happy and can spur others to become dysfunctional... and so can monogamy. It all depends on who you are. I put it all on the individuals involved to recognize what works for them.
Me, 30ish bi female, been doing solo poly for roughly 5 years. Gia, Clay, and Pike, my partners. Davis, ex/friend/"it's complicated." Eric, Gia's husband. Bee, Gia and Eric's toddler.
Reply With Quote