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Old 05-04-2011, 04:12 PM
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BlackUnicorn BlackUnicorn is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2011
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Originally Posted by curiouslez View Post
Now, I know this post may seem confusing considering my nick is curiousLEZ. Here's the deal, I've always connected with women more but always have been attracted to guys. I've *always* loved the idea of having both a woman and man in my life and that all three of us value eachother equally.

Is it wrong or unfair to say that I can only be with a guy if he and I also have a woman in my/our life at the same time??
It depends on how you define 'could'.

1) Could in that you need to have a woman in your life to spark that sexual interest/attraction to guys as well. If you are not with a woman, you don't want to be with a man either. You are just not that interested. In which case that is an orientation issue and has little to do with fairness. I was actually just today reading on bisexual (adjective) lesbians (noun) and if you have a severe case of Kinsey 4.5+, being with a man on a long-term exclusive basis might just not ring your bell strong enough.

2) Could in that you rather wouldn't for self-identification reasons but that there is nothing stopping you otherwise. In which case, you might benefit from self-educating on bisexuality and letting go of some of that anxiety.

Long story short - if you are honest from the get go that your attraction to men isn't very strong and you are new to this, why not? Trying for a poly-fi long-term triad with those parameters probably isn't the most viable move, but what about adding a guy to your intimate network on a more casual basis to start out with.

I personally wouldn't mind helping a bi-curious guy or girl explore their interests, provided everyone agreed to it beforehand and new what they were getting into.
Me: bi female in my twenties
Dating: Moonlightrunner
Metamour: Windflower
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