Feeling crazy nervous...

OneUncagedBird

New member
Hello everyone. I am currently single, but I was married to a man for 5 years, but after that I was in a relationship with a woman for 3. After much heartache and craziness from both and much self searching I have come to realize several things about myself. I am bisexual, and I want both a man and a woman in my life. I have told this to my friends, jokingly at times. But, since I am a very truthful person, my best friend took me seriously. I talked to her about it one day and she asked me the blunt question, "Why can't you have that? Why can't you have one of each?" To this I had no real answer. I guess that is why I am here on this website. What I want kind of freaks me out a little since all I can think of are those old movies from the 60s and 70s about people living on communes and delving into free love or whatever. And I have this fear that all this talk about openness and communication may not really help and that in the end multiple relationships may be a total distaster. Despite this, from reading various threads, discussing this with my best friend and a very close friend and giving this much thought I feel like I am in the right direction. And, I feel like I can relate to the people on this site and I don't feel so weird about my wants and needs. Alright, there it all is and here I am.:eek:
 
Welcome! This site seems like a perfect place for you to be! There are many who are bi-sexual and interested in poly relationships.
 
Thanks!

:)Thanks! I appreciate it. And I am feeling even more comfortable now that I have introduced myself and have been reading more threads! Life is crazy, isn't it? I never would have guessed that this is where I would be in a million years.
 
As a new member myself it probably isn't my place to say "Welcome" but I can say "Hello". :)
Reading your post and what your friend said about 'Why can't you have both?" reminds me of a conversation my wife and I had a long time ago when we were discussing having an open marriage. I said to her then "Who decided that we can only love ONE person? Who made up this rule? And WHY? Who decided that I am only capable, or able, to love only one person instead of two, three or twenty? Where is the limitation on a human beings capacity to love other people?"
Nice to meet you and hope we get more chances to exchange ideas.
IThink.​
 
too true..

Thank you Ithink. :) I find myself to be so loving and so invested in the people that I care for. I do see the capability in myself to love more than one person at a time. I could definitely handle it. And, you are right, who is to decide? I feel like we all have our own path in this life, and it is up to each of us to find our own way. We cannot judge one another. Plus, I am the one who has to lay down at the end of the day and live with my own conscience. If I am not harming others or causing harm to the environment, what is wrong with loving more than one person?
 
Welcome to the forum. You should work on shaking that 'weird' feeling. :) You are beautifully and lovingly unique and you can have all that you desire as long as you are willing to communicate and persevere. :D

I look forward to watching your journey.
 
^ That.

It is a wonderful thing to be able to accept who you are and what you want from life. To let mainstream society dictate whom, and how, you will love is to sell yourself short and possibly miss out on what could otherwise be an even more exceptional life than you might ever find.
 
hi :) i'm new here too, and that's the same reason i'm interested in poly. i am satisfied with my man but i feel like i need a relationship with a woman too. from what i've seen/read, poly relationships are a lot more complex but they can be very fulfilling. plus there are many couples out there looking for a woman to date so if that's what you're looking for you probably won't have to look far!
 
.... Alright, there it all is and here I am.:eek:

Glad you found us, Welcome!

Really, it seems so natural to me that we all can (and many do) have multiple simultanious loves. It hardly seems weird at all. .... Yeah, "society" frowns on
non-monogamy these days, but things are changing fast! Anyhow, there are lots of us around.
 
...plus there are many couples out there looking for a woman to date so if that's what you're looking for you probably won't have to look far![/QUOTE]

I know it does seem like that, right? Am I the fabled unicorn? From what I have gathered it is a woman who wants to be with more than one person but also doesn't want kids.... not sure on all the terms though I looked at the dictionary on here. Well, if I am not it doesn't really matter. Lol. But, I don't want kids and wouldn't necessarily have to be a first for someone. I am not at that place yet. I do have to say, the idea of being in a relationship with 2 people who are also together does seem a little intimidating.
 
^ That.

It is a wonderful thing to be able to accept who you are and what you want from life. To let mainstream society dictate whom, and how, you will love is to sell yourself short and possibly miss out on what could otherwise be an even more exceptional life than you might ever find.

This is so true. I found it to be so when I was dealing with my attraction to women and figuring out if I was lesbian or straight or bi. That was a heck of a journey and in the end I knew I just had to be me. But, I have kind of been like that most of my life. Ultimately, who gives a fuck what others think if I am happy? Oops, pardon my french!;)
 
Thanks, that is really sweet! You will definitely be hearing more from me on this site, I am very forward and not afraid to say what I think!
 
:)Thanks! I appreciate it. And I am feeling even more comfortable now that I have introduced myself and have been reading more threads! Life is crazy, isn't it? I never would have guessed that this is where I would be in a million years.

Hi OneUncagedBird,
I saw you posted on one of my threads recently. I didn't realize you were new on here, too. I never thought I'd find this forum or even put a name to my thoughts either. It all makes sense now. I'm learning and growing. I am in a situation where my husband now knows of how I feel but has asked that I not bring it up again, or we will face the Big D because he can never share himself with another woman. He refuses counseling and is avoiding the book study I've presented to him. I love him dearly, but this site is my outlet until I make future decisions.

I hope you find what you are looking for on this site.

Erin :p
 
Last edited:
I welcome you here. I'd say feel free to send a PM my way, but you seem to have already. ^_^ I hope the site is helpful for you as it was for me.
 
Somegeezer,
Has this forum helped you find love, advice, or other??? :)

I've found some great advice and a lot of information on who I am and why I am polyamorous. The reasons I feel this way. I have also felt welcomed by others who share the same and similar feelings. =]
 
I've found some great advice and a lot of information on who I am and why I am polyamorous. The reasons I feel this way. I have also felt welcomed by others who share the same and similar feelings. =]

Getting to sneak my convos on this forum makes me feel not so alone in my thoughts.

It's 11:15 pm here in Illinois. What time is for you?
 
Getting to sneak my convos on this forum makes me feel not so alone in my thoughts.

It's 11:15 pm here in Illinois. What time is for you?

Ah, Illinois. I have a friend over there in a small town called Farmer City? Over here in snow-filled England, it is 05:18. A good 6 hours ahead. =]
 
Ah, Illinois. I have a friend over there in a small town called Farmer City? Over here in snow-filled England, it is 05:18. A good 6 hours ahead. =]

I have nooooo idea where Farmer City is, unless of course if that's a joke because we have soooo many corn fields! ha ha

We experienced our first snowfall of the season tonight... just in time to pull out my little Cmas tree :)

How can you still be awake at 5 am - unless of course if you don't have a job, are in college, or are getting ready for work! I'm ready to hit the hay (pun intended) soon myself ::yawns::
 
I have nooooo idea where Farmer City is, unless of course if that's a joke because we have soooo many corn fields! ha ha

We experienced our first snowfall of the season tonight... just in time to pull out my little Cmas tree :)

How can you still be awake at 5 am - unless of course if you don't have a job, are in college, or are getting ready for work! I'm ready to hit the hay (pun intended) soon myself ::yawns::

No, it's definitely a real place, not so strangely, with a lot of crop harvest too, including corn. ^_^

First snowfall here was about a week ago. I can't rmemeber the last time it snowed in November. The first time it snowed on christmas in many years last year... and they say the world is getting warmer? Just take a look at this thick snow! >.<

As for being up at half 5 in the morning... I'm 18, no job, just left college and am just a night time person by nature. I generally sleep through the day. Even when I try to regulate my sleeping pattern like these regular humans, I still bounce right back to being awake through the night. It just suits me I guess.
 
Back
Top