So I guess that I'll just have to wait?
Yes, I think you'll just have to wait and be patient and let your wife go through her own process.
Would it help if you try to view emotional withdrawal as a healthy, viable, and necessary process for your wife to go through? Rather than as a "problem" to be fixed?
It sounds like your wife is urging you to get your emotional needs met somewhere else while she internalizes things herself.
If you were interested in sexual gratification, people would be urging you to masturbate...but in this case, you need emotional gratification...so what's the emotional equivalent of masturbation?
Start keeping a journal? Clean out closets? Do craft projects or scrapbook old photos? Write letters to old friends? Spend time pampering yourself? Take a weekend trip somewhere by yourself? Watch tear-jerker movies and let yourself sob and grieve?
I'm just listing things I do when I need to spend time centering my own emotions. The point is to find things that are self-nurturing and renewing.
i.e., finding ways to be alone without being lonely.