From an open but otherwise monogamous relationship
I'm doing all this research, and I seem to be discovering that when this happened (hubby falling in love with another woman) we reinvented the wheel on polyamory, and appear to be doing it perfectly so far. But I'm just wondering if I'm putting myself too much into this.
We were open but monogamous, in the sense that we were both cool with the other having (safe) sexual relations outside of the marriage. (Either separate or together, in a casual, temporary sense.)
This is different, because we're considering dating, and then bringing this person INTO the marriage, if all turns out to be compatible.
I barely know this woman, and though I think she is sweet, I am hereby willing to take the shirt off my back, open my home, and share my husband, because I love him, and he loves her. I've never before considered myself bisexual, but I'm opening my mind to making my very sexuality flexible in regards to her -- so my very sense of self is now in flux. Maybe it's because the concept of compersion is new to me, and I'm worried...
You know what, never mind. You're passing judgements rather than asking questions. I shouldn't have asked.
How careful should I be to protect myself? Because at this stage, I'm not. At all.
If anyone else has anything helpful to say, I'd be glad to hear it. If anyone else is going to accuse me of being bonkers, please keep your judgements to yourselves.
You are straight. You don't have to be involved at all. It can be his girlfriend and your friend. You can find a boyfriend. Trying to be bi in order to be poly is really ridiculous. Let your husband form his relationships, you form yours.Thank you KerryRen. That was a thoughtful and considerate response. We'd have to date her for awhile before we brought her into the household, of course, and we might not ultimately be compatible. Moving in wasn't the first step on the path, by a long-chalk.
If anyone else has anything helpful to say, I'd be glad to hear it. If anyone else is going to accuse me of being bonkers, please keep your judgements to yourselves.