How important is sex to you?

How do you view sex?

  • I'm a MAN...and I HAVE TO HAVE SEX to feel love

    Votes: 8 29.6%
  • I', a WOMAN...and I HAVE TO HAVE SEX to feel love

    Votes: 13 48.1%
  • I'm a MAN...and I could care less if I have sex or not.

    Votes: 3 11.1%
  • I'm a WOMAN...and I could care less if I have sex or not.

    Votes: 3 11.1%

  • Total voters
    27

TL4everu2

New member
Ok, I am one of the people who view sex as a necessity. I feel, that without sex, a relationship is a simple friendship. There is no love in it.

Please...Keep in mind that this is just how I feel....Not that I am trying to say that is the only way.



When my wife and I go for a period of time longer than 2 weeks without sex, I feel very depressed and very distant. I feel like she is looking for it elsewhere, and I'm not good enough or whatever.

She tells me that, she could take it or leave it, when it comes to sex. She doesn't "need" sex. :confused: I've heard this from other women also in reference to sex....Not just sex with ME, but just in reference to having sex...period....


So, I ask...What are your views toward sex?
 
And before it's said by someone else, I know the options are not all inclusive....but it's the best I could come up with.
 
My personal observation: As a women, the more I get sex, the more I crave it and when there are long breaks with no sex, the easier it is not to have it (some of my friends have said the same thing). When I have a long break without sex, I have to mentally phsyc myself up to welcome it again. Of course, this now adds a guilt factor because I feel that I should want sex, but I'm not in "the mood". I have to override my mood and just do it. Once things gets started again, I'm back to craving it.:D

Now no sex and no masterbation - I just get down right grumpy, bitchy and irritable. It's as if orgasams keep my brain chemicals balanced. Too bad it took me so long to realize this.
 
-couldn't- care less. There is no less care I could have for it, because I care the lowest amount.
 
My personal observation: As a women, the more I get sex, the more I crave it and when there are long breaks with no sex, the easier it is not to have it (some of my friends have said the same thing). When I have a long break without sex, I have to mentally phsyc myself up to welcome it again. Of course, this now adds a guilt factor because I feel that I should want sex, but I'm not in "the mood". I have to override my mood and just do it. Once things gets started again, I'm back to craving it.:D

Now no sex and no masterbation - I just get down right grumpy, bitchy and irritable. It's as if orgasams keep my brain chemicals balanced. Too bad it took me so long to realize this.

Agreed although there are times when I MUST have it, usually those times are leading up to my monthlies.

For the most part though I don't have to have it. It's great when it's there but my toys see more action with me than either of my partners do due to low libido, ED, & other factors.
 
I agree with SN: me too, the less I have sex, the harder it is to have sex again. It becomes almost a chore, there is much more pressure, etc. If I do have sex, I'm more likely to have it again. Then again, it's not a sure thing either.

I don't need sex to feel love, but I do think it's a different kind of love without the sex. I don't think it's friendship though, I still think it's love.

I also don't see sex as something that's independent on other people. I mean, if I'm missing sex with one person, I'd never go get it with someone else, because they're just different things. And similarly, having lots of sex with one person won't mean I'll "need" it less from someone else. I don't have a "sex" gauge that can be filled up by anyone. It's more of an intimacy thing that's dependent on each person, depending on how close I feel to them, how much I trust them and how attracted I am to them. However I can feel close to someone emotionally and not physically, or have a phase of not desiring intimacy with a specific person (or altogether).
 
-couldn't- care less. There is no less care I could have for it, because I care the lowest amount.

Somegeezer you got the grammar right. If you think about it it only makes sense that way. I don't know when people started saying it the other way.
 
Somegeezer you got the grammar right. If you think about it it only makes sense that way. I don't know when people started saying it the other way.

As far as I know, it started as an ironic statement, but then people starting using either of them interchangeably, possibly without looking too much into it.
 
It's an American thing. You wouldn't understand. :p
 
Sex is fun, but time to time I feel pressure to perform which makes it less fun. You also need to be rather fit to have good sex, which is a good reason to be fit I suppose.

How do people here keep sex with long term, non NRE partners interesting?
 
My personal observation: As a women, the more I get sex, the more I crave it and when there are long breaks with no sex, the easier it is not to have it (some of my friends have said the same thing). When I have a long break without sex, I have to mentally phsyc myself up to welcome it again. Of course, this now adds a guilt factor because I feel that I should want sex, but I'm not in "the mood". I have to override my mood and just do it. Once things gets started again, I'm back to craving it.:D

Now no sex and no masterbation - I just get down right grumpy, bitchy and irritable. It's as if orgasams keep my brain chemicals balanced. Too bad it took me so long to realize this.

If I masturbate, I crave sex.
The more sex I get, the more sex I want.
If I know I won't be getting it-I absolutely don't masturbate, cause it's just going to make me crave sex.

I don't need sex to feel loved, but I love sex so I wouldn't want to be in a relationship with someone monogomously that I couldn't have sex with-I don't think I could function that way-ever.
 
Interesting. Masturbation doesn't make me want sex more or less. It's like a totally separate entity for me.
 
More important than I'd dare to admit, but less important than open communication. Damn, I'm demanding.
 
I'm a MAN...and I HAVE TO HAVE SEX to feel love
I', a WOMAN...and I HAVE TO HAVE SEX to feel love
I'm a MAN...and I could care less if I have sex or not.
I'm a WOMAN...and I could care less if I have sex or not.
Ok, I am one of the people who view sex as a necessity. I feel, that without sex, a relationship is a simple friendship. There is no love in it.

Please...Keep in mind that this is just how I feel....Not that I am trying to say that is the only way.



When my wife and I go for a period of time longer than 2 weeks without sex, I feel very depressed and very distant. I feel like she is looking for it elsewhere, and I'm not good enough or whatever.

She tells me that, she could take it or leave it, when it comes to sex. She doesn't "need" sex. :confused: I've heard this from other women also in reference to sex....Not just sex with ME, but just in reference to having sex...period....


So, I ask...What are your views toward sex?
k, I'm finding this really hard to answer. It seems very monogamous orientated and I can't seem to break from that. I can not have sex with some and feel the same closeness and intimate connection with someone as I do someone I do have sex with.

Is sex important? Damned rights it is, but not with everyone and anyone. I can be attracted and physically capable in terms of my body reacting, but it is not necassary to the relationship to get off by fucking. On the other hand, in other relationships it really is and adds ten fold to the connection and depth I have. So yes to both questions really... I think?

I seem to be getting it wrong some how. could you give me more info?
 
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I can't tick any of the boxes.....

I am a woman. I don't need sex to feel love from someone. But I do care very much about having sex! I can never understand people who say it's just not important to them, but each to their own.

I also take slight exception to the idea of a friendship not being love. My loves are and have been based on a deep and vital friendship first and foremost, and there are several 'just friends' whom I love very very deeply, more so than some people I have sex with where the connection is 90% sexual and just casually friends.

So here's my own little box to tick: I am a woman, who can and does variously seperate love, friendship and sex in different circumstances (ie, just love/friendship, or just friendship/sex), but find others when all three collide to be the most wonderful amazing fulfilling relationships in my life!! That ok?
 
I can't tick any of the boxes.....

I am a woman. I don't need sex to feel love from someone. But I do care very much about having sex! ......<snip>

I also take slight exception to the idea of a friendship not being love. My loves are and have been based on a deep and vital friendship first and foremost, and there are several 'just friends' whom I love very very deeply, more so than some people I have sex with
this! thank you pixie for saying this part better than I could. Tired I guess ;)
 
The answer to this one for me is pretty easy. No sex, no love. Period. Of course, I'm biased as sex is the primary reason I get involve in relationships at all. For me, all of my other needs can be fulfilled by friends and the occasional cuddle party without the extreme mental, spiritual, and financial risk that comes with a romantic relationship.
 
I can't tick any of the boxes.....

I am a woman. I don't need sex to feel love from someone. But I do care very much about having sex! I can never understand people who say it's just not important to them, but each to their own.

What she said.

I go through long dry spells - and I go through spells where W tries to hide from me. Neither changes my ability to love him or be in love with him.

Nor does sex define who I love.

Right now I'm in a dry-ish spell that is ramping up to a spell of voracious appetite... I'm tempted to warn him ;)
 
I can't tick any of the boxes.....

I am a woman. I don't need sex to feel love from someone.
Then the appropriate box for you to click, would be the last one, which says "I'm a woman and I could care less if I have sex or not". I mean, you almost quoted it when you stated it above. ;) No idea why the confusion.

this! thank you pixie for saying this part better than I could. Tired I guess ;)
Since you agree, then the same would go for you too RP.

Not trying to be offending in any way either ladies. Just stating something which, to me, is obvious.



I also stated at the end that there would obviously be other options, and I apologized for not being smart enough to include everyone's choices. I simply couldn't think of them all. LOL I mean, there are about as many ways of showing romantic love, as there are people. There's only 10 choices possible. I tried to keep it simple and broadly generalized.

So, you either have to have sex in order to complete romantic love, or you don't. I, personally, do. :cool:
 
What she said.

I go through long dry spells - and I go through spells where W tries to hide from me. Neither changes my ability to love him or be in love with him.

Nor does sex define who I love.

Right now I'm in a dry-ish spell that is ramping up to a spell of voracious appetite... I'm tempted to warn him ;)
Actually, I think thta you would have to tick the one which says "I'm, a WOMAN...and I HAVE TO HAVE SEX to feel love". The reason? Because you said you have dry spells...which indicates that there are times when you feel you DO need it. So yeah...you would tick the one I said.
 
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