Do you prioritise people or events?
For some people, their husbands golf fun day will always trump their boyfriends super hugely important work function thing simply because he is the spouse, the primary, and he comes first. Other people prioritise by event. In the situation described above, they'd put the work thing of their boyfriends before the golf thing because it's more important on the grand scale of important things in life. This means that the primary relationship gets next to no privilege. Nothing will ever come first just because you are the spouse. Would this work for you? Do you put people over events? Do you require a more concise hierarchy than this?
For some people, their husbands golf fun day will always trump their boyfriends super hugely important work function thing simply because he is the spouse, the primary, and he comes first. Other people prioritise by event. In the situation described above, they'd put the work thing of their boyfriends before the golf thing because it's more important on the grand scale of important things in life. This means that the primary relationship gets next to no privilege. Nothing will ever come first just because you are the spouse. Would this work for you? Do you put people over events? Do you require a more concise hierarchy than this?